The Date
by Vlad-the-Impish
Summary: Xander hopes that Lightning doesn't strike twice.
1. Chapter 1

The Date 

**UC Sunnydale,**

**Sunday 7th November 1999, 16:00**

If anyone who knew Xander Harris saw him right now, they'd be extremely worried for whoever he was looking for. The look on his face has appeared before but not often; Buffy was on the receiving end of it once when the Anointed One kidnapped Willow, Angelus witnessed it during their confrontation outside Buffy's hospital room, Jack O'Toole witnessed it when they were standing either side of a bomb.

The person that caused the look to return is Parker Abrams, the man who in Xander's opinion gives all men a bad name. His treatment of Buffy, the woman who Xander has once again fallen for, has enraged him and vengeance is called for. As he stalks toward the frat house that Parker lives in, it is as though an invisible plough is clearing him a path, people instinctively moving out of the brunette mans way for fear that his anger will spill out onto them.

He throws open the door to the frat house, those in the living area turning to the sudden noise. "Where is he?" he asks in a cold voice, far more effective than any bellow.

"W.Who?" one of them asks, desperately hoping his name won't be the answer.

"_Parker_," Xander replies with a sneer that sends shivers down everybody's spines. Silence reigns for a few moment as they all choose whether to betray their frat brother or not. Patience is not one of Xander's virtues at the moment and he growls slightly, "don't make me ask again, you won't like how I go about it." they all look at each other before nodding in unison.

"Second floor, third door to the right." Xander nods once in acknowledgement before making his way to the stairs. As he does so, the brothers in the living area sigh in relief before quickly leaving, not wanting to be around when the screaming starts.

It only takes a few seconds for Xander to be standing in front of Parker's door, preparing himself for what he was about to do. He is trying to keep his anger in check as he knows he could easily kill the man that's the other side of the door if he loses control; he maybe a killer but he is not a murderer. Taking one more calming breath to ensure his anger remains at a slow boil he kicks in the door to Parker's room.

"Hey there Parker, we need to have a conversation about treating women with respect."

"Who are you?" Parker asks with a slight hitch in his voice. Try as he might he cannot contain the fear he is feeling right now, having the door to your room kicked in isn't exactly a calming experience. He's sure that if he saw the man standing in front of him at any other time he wouldn't pay him a second glance but right now he was danger given human form and impossible to ignore.

"I'm a friend of Buffy Summers," was Xander's terse reply, doing his best to resist the urge to put Parker's head through every solid object in the room.

"Who?" Parker knew that was the wrong response immediately as Xander surges forward with a vicious right hook that sends the other man flying into the wardrobe behind him, turning it into nothing more than a pile of kindling. Blood is flowing freely from his obviously broken nose, his eyes glassy and unfocused.

"The amount of pain you'll end up in during this conversation completely depends on how you respond to what I say, so I suggest you think before you speak from now on." Parker nods his head carefully; aware of the pain he is already feeling. He can see that the man standing over him has no qualms in causing him serious and possibly permanent damage. "Do I take it that you now remember who Buffy is?"

"Yes." He did remember the petite blonde now, was a descent enough lay but she was too clingy for his liking after the fact and it took him a while to extricate himself from her surprising strong grip when he made his exit later that night. He'd had better, but it tided him over until the following night when he met Anya, who while being completely without tact had a mastery of her inner muscles that was second to none.

"You flirted with her, made it seem you wanted a relationship and then once you got what you wanted you dumped her like yesterdays trash. If you had made it clear from the beginning that you were just looking for a good time, I wouldn't be here and you wouldn't need a new wardrobe. Instead, you lead her on and left her a crying mess without a single word of explanation. I take offence to anyone that does that to one of my girls, generally ending with me putting something sharp in the offending person's chest," Parker's eyes widen in fear at the prospect of being killed, "but I tend to shy away from things that would send me to jail for the rest of my life unless I have no other option." Parker's fear lessens but doesn't disappear, not by a long shot.

"Whatever you want I'll do it." Xander smiles, but Parker can tell there's no humour behind it, in fact it unnerves him greatly.

"I'm very glad to hear that. This is what's going to happen; you're going to apology wholeheartedly and sincerely to Buffy, making it clear that she is in no way at fault for what happened."

"I can do that." Parker quickly said.

"You can and you will, that is if you like the use of your legs." The smell of urine reaches Xander's nose and he looks down at Parker with distaste.

"I give you my word." Parker said, only to have Xander stamp on his right knee, causing it for a moment to bend the wrong way and sending blinding pain through Parker's system.

"Your word means shit to me, but I will hold you to it. You'll also promise me, right here and now, that you will _never_ treat another woman the way you treated her."

"I promise," he immediately responded, "I'll never do it again."

"You better not, because if you don't I _swear_ they will never find your body. This is you're only 'get out of jail free' card you'll ever receive from me."

"I swear on my mother's life!" he shouts.

"Good." Xander punches him full force in the face once again, sending Parker into unconsciousness before leaving his room.

He had so wanted to inflict more damage to him, to return the pain he caused Buffy ten-fold, but to do any more than he already had would make no better than his father and he swore on Jesse's grave that he would never allow that to happen.

Now that was over, he could prepare himself for the hard part of his self-imposed mission; asking Buffy out on a date.


	2. Chapter 2

The Date 2 

**The Bronze,**

**Monday 8th November 1999, 19:30**

Buffy was sitting at one of the table near the bar, idly stirring her drink with a straw. When Xander had called her and asked if they could talk, she wondered what was wrong. Apart from when Xander first came back to Sunnydale, they haven't really had too much to do with each unless it was Slayer related. She didn't even realise that until he rang, and that made her feel extremely guilty that she had once again taken his friendship for granted.

She knew that they couldn't see each other as much as they had in high school because they were doing different things, Xander was working construction and she was at college, but she could have made more of an effort to see him. He had tried, asking both herself and Willow to go Bronzing or just to have a night in watching movies, but they had always declined, saying they had other things planned. It wasn't a lie, they really did have other things planned, but thinking back not one thing they did should have come before their friend who had been there for both of them more time then they could count.

Ever since her nightmare with Parker, she had been feeling really down; Willow had tried to cheer her up but there wasn't much that she could do. She had even thought of drowning her sorrows when a few of her classmates had asked her to join them at a bar, but her common sense had prevailed and she declined, knowing that drinking to forget is the first step on a road she didn't want to travel.

Things started to turn around this morning when Parker had turned up at her dorm room, looking like he'd gone ten round with Mike Tyson, apologising profusely for being a universal asshole and mistreating her in such a way. She had been too stunned t speak so she just nodded and he then ran like the devil himself was after him.

When Xander had rung, she had felt happier than she had in quite a while, once again realising how lucky she was to have someone like Xander in her life.

When he arrived half an hour ago, she was surprised at how smartly he was dressed and had to do a double take just to be certain that it was indeed her Xander-shaped friend. Gone were the kaleidoscopic Hawaiian shirts, instead he was wearing a simple silver-grey button down shirt, pressed black pants and a brown leather jacket. She had to admit that he looked good, very good in fact.

Before getting to why had had asked to talk, they caught up on what the other was doing; she told him how she was getting on with college, how she was having a hard time in her Psych class but was keeping up with the others, then he told her how his work was getting on, hearing in his voice that he was actually enjoying what he was doing, and that his boss thought that he had great potential.

She could tell that construction did him good; the physicality of his work had bulked him up so that he was filling out his shirt where before it would just hang from his shoulders. It wasn't until he had asked her whether there was a stain on his shirt that she realised that she had been staring at him and quickly assured him that his shirt was fine.

When he went to get the drinks, she was glad that she had time to calm herself down. The moment he arrived, she had been thinking and feeling things that she had never contemplated before, all to do with Xander. It was like she had met him for the first time instead of having known him for three years.

Despite the fact they had grown apart these last couple of months, he was one of her closest friends and the things filtering into her mind were definitely not what one friend should think about another. Chalking it up to emotional fatigue, she put all more-than-friendly thoughts concerning Xander to the back of her mind.

Xander comes back with the drinks, a gentle smile on his face that immediately rings all the thoughts she was having back into her mind. "There you go Buff."

"Thanks Xand, so what is it you wanted to talk about?"

"Well, you see, the thing is, what I… _Damn it_! I've been thinking about this for weeks now, thinking of the right things to say and do, and now I'm actually here I go straight back to the gibbering fool I've always been!"

"Calm down Xander, you know you can tell me anything, right?" she asked, wondering what was wrong with her friend.

"Normally, but you've never bee receptive to this particular line of questioning before." Buffy quickly begins to realise what he's trying to say, her eyes widening at the implications.

"Xander…" he cuts her off before she can continue.

"I know, you've never seen me 'that way'," he continued, failing to keep the bitterness he feels concerning those two little words, "but I can't help the way I feel. I haven't been pining away for you for years, I had gotten over the high school crush I had on you thanks to Cordy, this is a recent reoccurrence. There's no Spring Fling, but I still wanna dance with you. One date is all I want, one chance at the brass ring. If after that date you want to stay friends I can live with that, I won't like it not in the least, but I can accept it. So, waddaya say?"

At the moment Buffy was in two minds, one was screaming 'Yes!' at the top of its lungs, the other was worried that it would ruin one of the most important relationships in her life. She loved him, but recent feelings aside, she wasn't sure that she loved him the way that Xander wanted. She loved Willow as well, but that didn't mean she wanted to date her.

When Xander had come back from his road trip, just at the time she needed his support the most, she realised that she didn't think she could go on if he wasn't in her life. She had loved Angel more than life as he did her; they'd proved that to each other more than once. Even with all that, when he left all those months ago she knew that she would survive, it would be painful but she had Willow and Xander to help her through.

With Xander it was so much more, she didn't think that either herself or Willow would ever get over losing Xander from their lives and she knew the same went for him. She knew that if she ever allowed herself to love him like that and he did leave, for whatever reason, it would be even worse than it would be now. She simply didn't know whether she could risk leaving herself so open to him like that.

She can see that her silence is like torture to him and decides to be as honest as she can. "I really don't know what to say Xander, this is just so sudden."

"I don't need an answer right now Buff, I'll give you all the time you need. It's probably better that you don't give me an answer right now; I don't want you to have second thoughts after the fact. When you know what you want, one way or the other, I don't want you to have any doubts because I can't go through this again, it's too easy to love you and too hard to let go."

There is a question that she both needs to and is afraid to ask. "What if I say no?"

"Whatever happens Buff, I'll always be here for you. I can't promise everything will stay the same, at least not in the short-term, but one thing I promise you is that I'll never leave, not while there's air in my lungs." She can see the sincerity in his eyes and knows that he's speaking the truth.

Tears begin falling down he cheeks as the realisation that he'll never leave her sets in, causing Xander to rush round the table and pull her into a hug. "I didn't mean to make you cry."

"It's not that; I don't know what to do if you ever left." She said between sobs.

"Well you'll never have to find out 'cos you're stuck with me whether you like it or not."

"I like it, I definitely like it." After a few minutes, Buffy has calmed down enough for Xander to release her, although he does so reluctantly. "I need to do a quick sweep of the cemeteries before I get home."

"Okay, do you need a hand?"

"Nah, I've got this. I promise that you won't have to wait long for your answer Xand."

"Okay." Buffy can tell he's expecting in what his minds is the inevitable brush off. Knowing that whatever she says would only make things worse, she decides against saying anything and after giving him another brief hug and an unexpected kiss on the cheek, she leaves the Bronze.


	3. Chapter 3

The Date 3 

**Summers Residence,**

**1630 Revello Drive,**

**Tuesday 9th November 1999, 14:30**

When Buffy had got back from patrol last night, Willow was already asleep and she didn't want to disturb her for what she knew was going to be a long conversation, so she too decided to get some sleep.

When she woke up the next morning, Willow had already left for her Physics lesson and Buffy knew that she didn't have any classes with Willow today so she wouldn't see her until tonight.

Luckily, she only had classes in the morning, leaving the afternoon free to see her mom. She tried to see her whenever she could, but it was still less than she wanted. Now she needed to see her, hoping that she'd be able to give her some insight into the viper's nest that was her love life.

Knowing that she shut the gallery early on Tuesday's, she decided to go round to the house in hopes of catching her before she went out again. It seemed that her mom had a busier social calendar now she wasn't at home than she ever did when she lived there, she still wasn't sure whether that was a good thing or not. The more that she socialised, the more chance there was of meeting someone and she hated to have to kill another one of her boyfriends. Yes, Ted was an evil robot, but the point still stands.

Deciding to knock instead of using her key, which felt more than a little strange, she only had to wait a few seconds before her mom opened the door, smiling upon seeing her.

"Hello honey, how nice to see you!" Joyce said as she pulled her into a hug.

"Same here mom. Do you have a moment?" she asked as they let go of each other and went into the living room.

"You know I'll always make time for you dear, not matter what. Why didn't you use your key?" she asked.

Buffy sighs as she flops down on the couch. "Well I don't live here anymore…" she trailed off, not really knowing why she didn't. Joyce sits next to her daughter on the couch, placing her hands into her own.

"Buffy, no matter where you're living, this will always be your home and you're welcome to come and go as you please, alright?" she asked/stated.

Buffy does her best to hold back the tears welling up in her eyes for some strange reason and just nods her head slightly. "Okay."

Joyce gently pulls Buffy towards her into a hug; something Buffy really needed right at that moment. They release each other after a few moments and Joyce decides to help Buffy out, seeing as she looks a little hesitant. "So, what is it that you wanted to talk about?" Joyce asked, always happy to help her daughter out if she can.

Buffy decided that, for once, she'd get straight to the point, this was too important to do otherwise. "Xander asked me out."

"Oh," she said slightly surprised but decidedly happy, "do you need help on what to wear?" she asked brightly.

Buffy rolled her eyes, "no, I need help figuring whether to say yes or not."

"I don't think I can give you an unbiased opinion," Joyce said.

"I don't want an unbiased opinion I want an honest one," Buffy replied. "What do you honestly think?"

"I think that the only think you should be trying to work out is what to wear on your date. I think the world of Xander; when you were… away, he came over almost everyday to make sure I was alright."

"He did?" she asked surprised, having never heard that before.

"Oh yes, he would have dinner with me most nights. He said it was because he loved my cooking but I know it was to keep an eye on me. He has this desire to make others feel better, which is surprising given…" she trails off as she remembers whom she was talking to.

"Given what?" Buffy asked, wondering why her mother trailed off like that.

"That's not for me to say Buffy," hoping she would leave it at that, "forget I said anything. He also did odd jobs around the house, he has a knack for fixing things."

Buffy knows she wouldn't be able to get anything out of her mother so she drops the subject, for the time being at least. "I wonder why he never told me?"

"If you know anything about Xander it's that he doesn't see what he does as anything special so he sees no need to point it out." She commented, Buffy having to concede the point.

"So you really think I should go out with him?" she asked, Joyce noticing the slightly hopeful tone in her voice.

"At the end of the day the decision is up to you, but yes I think you should at least give it a chance."

"What if it goes wrong?" she asked, her fear of losing him prevalent in her mind.

"You shouldn't keep thinking about that things that can go _wrong_, you should think about the things that can go _right_. With other people you have to hide part of who you are, which can be a strain on a relationship especially the beginning of one. You don't have that problem with Xander, as he already knows everything about you and even helps you. He isn't bothered by the fact you're stronger than him, something many men will hold against you no matter what they might outwardly say. From a completely motherly point of view, he's got a good steady job with excellent career prospects, something a mother always looks for from a prospective son-in-law."

"_Mom_!" Buffy cried, "I'm not even going out with him yet!"

"I know dear, you're nowhere near that sort of thing, but as your mother it's my duty to think of your future. I also noticed you said that you weren't dating him _yet_." She pointed out.

"I guess I'm leaning toward the 'yes' side of the argument," she replied, "it's just that he's too important to me already, I don't know what I'd do if things didn't work out."

"Life is about taking risks and I don't see this as a big one."

While her fears were still troubling her, Buffy had no option but to believe her mom. Deciding to leave that subject for the time being, having one more person to speak to before she made her mind up, she changes the subject and spends the next hour catching up with her mother, deciding that she needs to find out more about this 'Nigel' her mother kept mentioning.


	4. Chapter 4

The Date 4

**Buffy and Willow's Dorm Room,**

**UC Sunnydale,**

**Tuesday 9th November 1999, 21:45**

Willow was sitting at her desk finishing off her revision whilst waiting for Buffy to arrive. She had found a message left on her bed when she got in from Buffy saying that she needed to talk to her about something and that she was going to patrol early that night to make sure that they were both wide awake for it.

She had instantly become worried about what it might be, but quickly realised that if it had been anything 'Hellmouthy' as Xander puts it, she would have told her to meet her at Giles' apartment, or come to see her before patrol.

That meant that it was something personal and, knowing that she hadn't done anything to upset her friend, knew that was probably boy related.

That thought made her happy; Buffy had been in a sullen mood ever since 'Poopy Parker', with Buffy clearly stating that all men, excluding Xander and Giles, were bastards of the highest order and that she was taking a vow of chastity.

She remembered Xander's face when he heard that, she doesn't think he breathed at all for the next five minutes. It was then that she noticed that he had started looking at Buffy the way he did when he first met her and for a moment she felt a pang of jealousy that she quickly dismissed.

She hadn't felt that way about Xander for quite some time, even during their fluking incident her feelings for him weren't like they were when Buffy had arrived in Sunnydale. She realised that it was simply her mind remembering what she felt like when she had first seen those smitten looks Xander had thrown the blonde's way, looks that she either didn't see or simply ignored.

As always, her thoughts turn to her boyfriend. Oz was still on tour with the Dingoes for a few more days and she was missing him terribly. Their relationship was going from strength to strength and she was pretty sure that he was 'the one'.

The only sticking point was his lycanthropic status; they've been doing some research on their own and found out that if they had children, they too would become werewolves once they hit puberty. That did explain how his baby cousin managed to infect him in the first place; she couldn't see how a werewolf would have been able to bite a baby without killing it. That meant that Willow was also at risk of becoming infected, so they've been trying to find ways to either rid him of the wolf or find a protection spell for her.

She did want children one day and she wanted Oz to be the father, but she didn't want to keep her kids in a cage for three nights a month. Of course, they could simply have their house made of reinforced steel and a time lock built on the door…

They still had time to think about it, they had decided to wait until they'd graduated from college before making those sorts of plans, but she wanted to make sure that they had options when it came to the time.

She's brought out of her thoughts when the door to their dorm room opens and Buffy appears, partially covered in iridescent gunk.

"Buffy, you okay?"

"Yeah, I just had a run in with a tissue demon is all. They're not hard to kill, but they do bleed a lot."

"You mean a Tik'Schu demon?"

"That's what I said, a tissue demon." Sometimes Willow didn't know whether she said the names wrong on purpose or she simply couldn't pronounce then correctly. "I need to have a shower before we talk, I smell like a cesspool." She's in the shower before Willow can reply.

Fifteen minutes later, a freshly cleaned and happier looking Buffy appears from the shower, dressed in a terrycloth bathrobe and her hair wrapped in a towel.

She walks over and plops herself down on her bed, Willow taking that as an indication that she's ready to talk so she leaves her desk and mirrors Buffy's position on her own bed.

"So, what's the sitch?" the redheaded Wicca asked after about a minute of silence, she could tell that Buffy was nervous about something and needed a gentle push to get her going.

Buffy decides to continue the trend of getting straight to the point she started with her mother. "Xander asked me out last night."

"Oh." That threw Willow for a loop; yes, she knew that Xander had started his 'can I have you?' phase with Buffy again, but she didn't think he would put himself on the line again by asking her out. She remembers how sullen he was the last time.

His self-esteem has always been his biggest weakness and it had taken an extreme amount of courage for him to ask her out the last time, the first time he had ever asked anyone out in fact. If it hadn't been for that prophecy concerning the Master, she knew that Xander would have been a contender for Angel's world brooding championship title.

Going by previous experience, and the fact Buffy has never shown any interest in Xander beyond friendship, she comes to the only logical conclusion. "How did he take it when you turned him down?"

"I didn't," she said, surprised that that was the first thing she asked but understood why.

Willow once again comes to the logical, if completely wrong, conclusion. "You said _yes_!" She has no idea why she said that so loud, or so incredulously. She had no problem with them being together, it was just the shock of it all she figured.

"No, but it sounds like you'd have a problem with it if I had." She responded, her voice sounding a disappointed that Willow thought that way.

"_No_! Not at _all_!" she exclaimed, trying to back-pedal from her over the top reaction. She then gets confused, "wait, you didn't say yes, you didn't say no, so what _did_ you say?"

"If you'd let me get a word in edgeways I'd _tell_ you."

"Hey! There's no need to get snappish with me."

"Sorry," Buffy said a little sheepishly. "I didn't know what to say and I told him that, so he said he's give me some time to think about it."

"_Have_ you thought about it?" she asked, hoping that Buffy wasn't just dismissing him. She didn't know if he would survive it if Buffy simply ignored the question altogether.

"I haven't thought of much else," she admitted, smiling a little. "What do you think I should do?" she asked, still worried that Willow might have a problem with her going out with Xander.

She was sure the Wicca didn't have any more-than-friendly feelings for Xander, but she has always been very picky about who he goes out with. Knowing his dating history she couldn't blame her either.

"That completely depends on how you feel," she replied diplomatically.

Personally she thought they'd make a cute couple; even when she was still jonesing for him herself a tiny part of her felt that if she couldn't have him she wouldn't mind Buffy having him instead.

She knows that made her sound possessive, but she always has been when it came to Xander, and probably always would. "Don't take this the wrong way, but I've never seen any sign of interest in Xander on your part before."

"You're right, I haven't really. It's not like I can say I've never thought of him like that, but it was never more than a fleeting moment. I've even had one about Giles."

"Firstly, I'd like to say eww to that last statement, that's _Giles_ you're talking about."

"Whatever," Buffy responded with hand gesture and a smile. She had had the same thought herself when that particular thought containing Giles had entered her mind, but she realised that it was just a harmless fantasy and nothing to be worried about.

"Secondly, I take it that's changed? The way you think about Xander I mean?"

"Yeah; when he called and said he wanted to meet up, it was as though I'd gotten back a part of myself I didn't know I'd lost. I suddenly realised that I'd come very close to losing him from my life and the thought made me feel hollow."

"I've felt the same way, that doesn't mean I want to start dating him, are you sure you're not just feeling guilty about neglecting him and want to make it up to him?" she asked, being the Devil's Advocate that she knows Buffy wants her to be.

She'd learned some time ago that Buffy needed someone to challenge her point of view from time to time, to ensure that she was thinking things through clearly. Normally she didn't have to assume that role as Xander had a natural talent for it, but with his growing absence in their non-Scooby lives, she'd had to take his place. She had to suppress a shudder at that, the thought of replacing Xander in any way just didn't feel right.

"No, when he turned up it was as though I was meeting him for the first time. Firstly he looked _good_; not just 'those clothes look good on him' good, but also 'those clothes would look good on my bedroom floor' good."

"TMI! TMI!" Willow exclaimed in mock horror.

"As I said before," Buffy continued, choosing to ignore Willow's interruption, "I can admit to having the stray thought about him before, the Speedo incident comes to mind, but nothing that felt like last night. These weren't sexy thoughts," she sees the look Willow is giving her and blushes slightly as she remember her last statement, "okay, not _just_ sexy thoughts, there were boyfriend-y thoughts. I've _never_ had boyfriend-y thoughts about Xander before, and I liked them." She said with a shy smile.

"Don't take this the wrong way then, but what's the problem? You like him in a boyfriend-y way, you _know_ how Xander feels about you, so why are you needing time to think?" she asked reasonably. She couldn't see why she hadn't just said yes when he asked her, but Buffy does like to turn things into an episode of 'All My Children' from time to time.

"Because it's _Xander_! He's been there every time I've needed him, supporting me and encouraging me, even telling me what I needed to hear instead of what I wanted to hear. We're talking about a guy that stepped between two Slayers to stop them from fighting because it was the right thing to do, and to make amends for what he did. He told me that he'd always be there for me no matter what I decide, but I know that he'll have to keep his distance from me for a while and that thought alone scares me to death. If I actually went out with him and something went wrong, I don't think I could take it. Both you and Xander mean so much to me already, I'm worried about letting him in any further."

"I don't see any of that as a bad thing; all it means is that on top of all the good stuff you get from being friends with him, you also get Xander smooches. That is something I can fully endorse by the way and it didn't look like Cordelia minded them either."

"Willow Rosenburg I am shocked and appalled!" she said with a wide smile.

"Of course you are, being the pure and virtuous woman that you are. Seriously though I don't see you've got anything to worry about and if you keep worrying about what might happen you'll never do anything. Now go phone Xander and put him out of his misery before I do it for you."

With a smile, Buffy gets up and hugs her best friend. "What would I do without you Willow?"

"Don't worry you'll never have to find out." Willow watches as Buffy goes to the phone and rings Xander and can't help but hear the shout of joy coming from the receiver as Buffy gives him the answer he's been longing to hear.


	5. Chapter 5

**Espresso Hut,  
Sunnydale Mall,  
Wednesday 10th November 1999, 13:00**

Willow was sipping on her half-fat, medium foam, half-caff cappuccino with white and dark chocolate sprinkles waiting for Xander to arrive. It had been a while since they had spent time together without it being Hellmouth related and she was feeling guilty about it. The fact she didn't even realise it until Buffy talked about going on a date with him last night didn't make her feel any better.

She had called into him at his works earlier, asking him to meet her for lunch. She couldn't help but return the beaming smile he sent her way as he accepted the invitation, realising that she had been missing his company more than she thought, but she'd also felt sad and guilty that his face showed surprise that she'd made such an offer.

She had watched him work for a few minutes before she was able to catch his eye, and she was surprised by how into his work he was. She never really saw Xander as the construction type before, even he would admit to not having the typical build for that type of work, but she could see that he was enjoying it and was happy for him.

She knew how worried he'd been about the prospect of moving from one dead end job to another, never making enough money to move out of his parent's place, so she was glad for him that he found something he both liked and could turn into a career.

She finally spots him weaving his way through the crowd, his work clothes from the construction site giving him a more rugged look. She was pleased to not that he was walking more confidently than ever; he rarely held himself at his full height in High School but now he was walking tall.

As he comes inside he speaks to one of the waitresses, probably ordering himself a beverage, before plopping down in the chair opposite her.

"Hey Wills, how ya doin'?" he asked cheerily.

"Fine thanks, it's good to see you." She said sincerely.

"Well it's good to be seen. What prompted you to call in on me?" he asked, not accusingly but honestly curious. "Don't get me wrong, I love having some uninterrupted Willow-Time, but you haven't exactly been all that willing to give it recently." He pointed out.

"I know and I'm sorry, I've let myself get so preoccupied with college life that I started to neglect you." She replied, her guilt obvious in both her voice and features.

"Hey, college is a big thing and I know how you love new challenges."

"That's no excuse for letting our friendship become a victim to it."

"You're right, it isn't," he conceded, knowing that she'd keep arguing the point, "but that doesn't mean that it's all your fault. I'm as much to blame as you are, I could have made more of an effort."

She wasn't going to argue with him, even though she knew he had tried several times to get both her and Buffy to meet him and they'd both turned him down each time.

"Let's call it even and agree not to let it happen again, deal?" she asked, holding her pinkie out to him.

He wraps his pinkie around hers and they shake once. "Deal."

For the next couple of minutes they sit in companionable silence, only breaking when the waitress brings Xander his large cappuccino. Willow notices that she flirts with him but as usual he doesn't notice.

Willow eventually decides to break the silence by bringing up the topic of a certain date. "So I hear you have a date with a certain blonde I know."

Even the mention of Buffy brings a large bright smile to appear on his face. "Sure do, I'm thinking of changing my middle name to Borg 'cos resistance is futile." They both laugh at that for a few moments, and then Willow composes herself.

"You know I love you right?" she asked uncertainly. It brings it home to her how far apart they'd got that she was no longer certain.

"Of course, I love you too," He replied in his best 'well duh!' voice. "Why?"

"Are you sure about this? You and Buffy I mean?" she asked.

She knew for certain how Buffy felt about it, and she had a fair idea how he felt as well, but she wanted to hear it from the horse's mouth just to be certain.

"I've never been more sure about anything," he said with absolute sincerity and conviction. "I've pretty much fallen for her all over again and I'm going to use the next fifty or so years to prove it to her."

"You're getting a little ahead of yourself there aren't you? You've not even gone on your first date." She pointed out.

She was happy that he was so enthusiastic, but she was a little worried that he was making more of this than there was.

"The date is only secondary; the major hurdle was always going to be her actually saying yes. I knew that she wouldn't go out with me unless she was willing to seriously give us a chance and she knows I wouldn't have asked unless I felt the same. Everything else is gravy."

She had to concede to that point; neither of them would risk what they already have unless they were sure they could make it work. Xander knows enough about Buffy to ensure that their date will be a success as long as they relax and allow themselves to enjoy it without constantly worrying whether they were going to do something wrong.

"So where are you taking her?" she asked nonchalantly, well what she considered to be nonchalantly.

"Nice try Wills," he said with a smile, knowing exactly what she was doing.

"I have no idea what you mean," she said with as much sincerity as she could muster, which wasn't a lot.

"As I told Buffy last night, where and what we're doing is going to be a surprise. I told her that I'll pick her up on Friday at 9 O'clock sharp and to bring a change of clothes and that's all she's getting."

She was busted and she knew it but that didn't stop her from trying. "Come on, you can tell me. I promise I won't tell her," she said, her fingers unconsciously crossing.

Xander notices that and just smiles knowingly at her, "I've learned that when it comes to this town the only way to keep a secret is to not tell _anyone_, not even my oldest and closest friend who couldn't keep a secret if her life depended on it."

"Hey! I resent that remark!" she exclaimed, even if she knew he was right on the money with that.

They both know that whatever he tells her she'll tell Buffy, she just wouldn't be able to keep it to herself. It wouldn't help that Buffy would get into interrogation mode the moment she saw her.

"Doesn't make it any less true though. I want it to be special; I've never actually had a proper date with anyone before and I'm pulling out all the stops for this one. One thing you can tell her though is that it'll be a night she'll never forget."

The lights in the coffee shop flicker slightly at his proclamation; Xander and Willow look at each other for a moment before laughing at how paranoid they've both become. Willow looks over Xander's shoulder when she recognises a familiar shape.

"Isn't that Joyce over there?" she asked.

Xander looks to where she was pointing and sure enough, there was Joyce Summers looking in the window of the chinaware store. He suddenly remembers that there was something that he needed to ask her, but knew that the middle of a mall wasn't the best place to do it, so he makes a mental not to go over to her house later today.

As he turns back round, he spots the clock behind the counter and realises that half his lunchtime had already gone and he hasn't eaten yet. "Sorry to drink and run Wills, but if I don't get something to eat before I go back I won't make it to quitting time."

"Not a problem Xand, I know you have to eat at least seven times a day to survive," she teased.

He ignores her as he drains his cup before placing money for both drinks down on the table.

"I'll see you later Wills."

"Have fun getting all sweaty while I'm in bed," she said, flushing slightly when she realised what she said, "I mean you at work getting sweaty and me in bed taking a nap."

He decides that it would be too easy to embarrass he about that last comment so he lets it slide. He nips round the table to give her a hug and a kiss on the forehead before making his way back to the site and his NKOTB lunch pale.


	6. Chapter 6

The Date 6

A/N: I have nothing against California. (Understanding will come later.)

Summers Residence,  
1630 Revello Drive,  
Thursday 11th November 1999, 17:45.

Xander is standing outside the house, trying to work up the courage to ring the doorbell. He knew that he was acting silly, but this was very important to him and he always gets nervous at times like this.

He's mentally berating himself for not doing this earlier, but in all the fun of beating on and scaring Parker he completely forgot.

Taking one more steadying breath, he takes the final couple of steps to the front door and rings the bell. After waiting a couple of seconds, he goes to turn and go when her hears the door being opened, Joyce smiling at him obviously happy to see him.

"Xander, what a pleasant surprise," Joyce said in a way only a mother could manage.

"Hi Mrs. Summers," Xander replied.

No matter how many times she's asked him to call her Joyce he always finds that he can't, at least not out loud. He simply doesn't feel comfortable in calling her by her first name; he's the same with Willow's parents as well and doesn't think that will ever change. He can only be himself.

Joyce waves him in, the norm for those in Sunnydale that were aware of the things that frequented the town after dark, even if it was someone she knew. Better to be safe than sorry, that's my motto. She thinks, a refreshing viewpoint for people living in Sunnydale.

She scowls playfully at Xander, remembering how he greeted her. "How many times have I asked you to call me Joyce?" she asked him as they made their way to the kitchen.

She had quickly learned when he would come round that Xander always felt better when talking to her in the kitchen as opposed to the living room, something else she could understand after meeting his parents.

During that whole MOO episode last year, she had gone round to his house to get his parents support and found that the cleanest room in the house was the kitchen as Xander was the one to use it.

His mothers idea of cooking was obviously ordering take away, and his father wouldn't know what an oven was if it hit him in the head. She had been tempted to try that theory out by the time she left his house.

They both gave off an aura of indifference that had irked her right away, especially as they had a child as wonderful as Xander, but knew that it would only make things worse for him if she had said anything. She doubted that they were abusive towards him, but she doubted they gave him much, if any, attention.

Xander shrugs his shoulders at the question, having heard it many times before. "I stopped counting after a hundred and change. As I told you before, it just doesn't feel right calling you Joyce, I can't explain it but that's how I feel." He said as he sat down at the counter

Joyce decides to let it drop, knowing the reason. She treats him with respect and it's his way of returning the courtesy. It's a bit old fashioned, but she can't fault him for it; she knows that he jokes to Buffy that he learned everything from watching TV but after meeting his parents a couple of years ago she doesn't think he's joking.

"So what do I owe the honour of a visit?" she asked as she started making hot chocolate, knowing how much he enjoyed it. "Not that I'm not pleased to see you as I am, it's just been a long time since you've come by on your own."

Once Buffy had come back from her 'sabbatical', Xander had stopped coming round with the frequency that he had during the summer and she can admit to missing his company. He was funny, smart, and an all round nice boy no, young man, she corrects herself mentally. While most men these days don't like being labelled as nice, Joyce couldn't think of a better word to describe him. His self-esteem still needs work, as does his fashion sense most of the time, but those minor flaws just make him more real against the artificiality that was California.

"Well, you see, I've come to ask you a question, something I should have asked before, but I kinda got caught up in the moment," he replied, obviously nervous about whatever it was he wanted to ask.

"What is it?" she asked, stopping what she was doing so she could look him in the eyes. "You know you can talk to me about anything right?" she asked, hoping he knew the truth in that.

"Yeah, I do." He pauses to take a calming breath. "It's about Buffy." Hearing her daughter's name instantly puts her into high alert.

"Is something wrong?" Xander can tell that she's taken his statement wrong and is quick to calm her.

"No, no, nothing's wrong. I kinda asked Buffy out on a date Monday night."

"Oh?" For some strange reason, she didn't mention that she knew already. He looked like he was nervous about something and interrupting him might stop him from getting to the heart of the matter, so she resumes making the hot chocolate.

"Yeah. She said yes, which is beyond great, but I realised that I should have asked for your blessing first." Joyce blinked in shock. None of her other boyfriends ever had the decency to ask, especially not that Angel creature. Of course it is a different era now, but it's nice that he thought about it. Of course she realised that it was just the sort of thing that Xander would do; he hadn't done it the last time he asked her out, but then again he didn't know her anywhere near as well as he does now.

"Why ever would you think that you need my blessing?" she asked, thinking that he should know she'd be more than happy if he and Buffy were a couple.

"Because your opinion means a lot to me, and I wouldn't want to cause any problems between you and Buffy. I know you didn't like her going out with Dea… Angel and that you two argued about it a few times, I would hate to be the cause of any arguments between you two." He's always trying to think of others before himself. I must remember to say I told you so to Buffy next time I see her. She's deeply touched that he thinks so highly of her, and that he cares enough about both Buffy and herself to not want cause waves between them.

"That's sweet Xander, but you don't need my blessing, anymore than Buffy needs my permission. She is old enough to make her own decisions over who she dates."

Xander knew that of course; when it came to Buffy you never make it sound that she wasn't completely in control of her life. He knew it was to do with being the Slayer; she feels that she has no control over that part of her life so she strives to have complete control over everything else.

In a way his being here had nothing to do with Buffy and everything to do with himself. He wanted to know that she was happy that he was going to be dating her daughter. This was about acceptance.

"I may not need it, but I would really like to know you're okay with it." She already knew what her answer was going to be, but she thought she'd find something out first.

"What would you do if I didn't give my blessing?" she asked.

"I'm really hoping I don't have to find out because I really love your daughter." He replied. One of the reasons he was so nervous about asking was because he had done this the wrong way round. If he had come here first and she said no to giving her blessing, he simply wouldn't have asked Buffy out and nothing would have changed. Now she had already accepted, he was more than a little afraid that she would say no; he had no idea what he would do.

Unaware of his inner musings, Joyce decides to have a little fun with him. She puts an apologetic look on her face and shakes her head slightly.

"I don't know that I can give you what you want Xander." The moment she realised who she was talking to, the enormity of her mistake was clear.

Xander's whole posture changes instantly on hearing her refusal, it was like watching a puppet after the strings had been cut. He stands up shakily as though his knees were to give way any moment and tries his hardest to look her in the eyes, but doesn't quite manage.

She can see tears beginning to appear in his eyes and begins to realise her attempt at fun has backfired quite extraordinarily.

"I'm sorry to have troubled you Mrs. Summers, I'll see myself out." Before she has a chance to rectify her mistake, Xander is out of the door and running down the drive as fast as his legs can carry him. She attempted to give chase, to get him to stop, but it was useless.

Xander just kept running, his vision blurring as furiously starts blinking, willing himself not to show how utterly foolish he felt. He had stupidly listened to the small part of his mind that said that she would give him her blessing; that she did indeed think him worthy. He should have known better.

He rarely cared about what other people thought of him; it wasn't as though they actually ever bothered to find anything out about him. Joyce was different because she had actually talked _with_ him and not just _to_ him. He had told her things that he had only ever revealed to Willow, that was how much he trusted her. He knew she cared about him, he could see it in her eyes. People can say the words but if it didn't show in their eyes it wasn't real. For her to think he was unsuitable caused him more pain than any wound ever could.

No longer able to bear even thinking about it, he blanked his mind and just kept running, not knowing if he ever wanted to stop.


	7. Chapter 7

The Date 7

Rupert Giles Residence,  
Sunnydale CA,  
Thursday 11th November 1999, 18:25

Xander didn't know why he found himself outside Giles' door; it wasn't as though he was thinking clearly when he ran from Joyce. In fact he hadn't been thinking at all, especially as he now remembered that he had left home without his usual stake, cross and holy water combo, it would have been just my luck to have been drained by some newbie, well at least I wouldn't have to face anyone. .

Brushing that thought aside, he starts to think that arriving at Giles' door wasn't such a bad thing; it wasn't as though he could go anywhere else. He doubted he'd ever be able to go back to Revello Drive the ways things are, home was never a place he wanted to go, especially when he felt down, and going to the campus would lead to conversations he was in no fit state to have.

It wasn't as though he didn't like Giles, he did, but the Englishman has never exactly felt comfortable talking about their love lives, or lack thereof in his case. The only problem he had was he didn't want to knock on his door. Giles was as much of a father to him as Joyce was a mother, he didn't know if he could stand to hear his disapproval on top of everything else.

While Giles has never been one to be forward with his emotions, they all know how he feels about them. It wasn't easy to tell when they all first met the now former Watcher, his stiff upper lip façade was difficult to see through, but they were soon able to see past that to the man behind.

His choice was taken away from him when Giles himself opens the door, surprised to see someone standing there.

"Who is… Xander?" he asked, surprised to see the young man.

He had decided to do a little patrol of his own that night, not wanting his own skills in that department from waning. He was also unsure of how often Buffy was patrolling and wanted to ensure that the vampire population wasn't increasing.

"I am Xander," he replied to Giles' stammered question, "you need to think of tougher questions for me G-Man." It was a futile attempt at a joke, but Xander needed to feel normal again, even if it meant relying on old defence mechanisms.

Further proof that his humour wasn't on par was that Giles saw right through it, or rather he didn't bother to hide the fact he saw through it.

"Xander what's wrong?" he asked, completely forgetting where he was going. His charges came before anything else in his eyes.

"Nothing," he replied, but the answer sounded as hollow to him as it did the ex-librarian.

Giles moves back a bit and gestures for Xander to come in, but Xander makes no move to enter. While he tries not to be, the last few years living on the Hellmouth have caused him to be rather paranoid and he starts to become suspicious. Taking another look at the young man, he can't see that there was anything physically wrong with him; his pallor wasn't abnormal and due to the cold temperature he could make out the steam coming from Xander's mouth as he exhales. What was worrying him, and giving him a reason to be suspicious, were Xander's eyes. Xander's eyes had always had a brightness to them, like tiny beacons keeping away the darkness from his soul. Now they were dull and lifeless, looking more at home on a corpse, or worse, a vampire.

Giles had almost gone for the sword he keeps behind the door when he noticed that Xander was wearing his gold cross; it was touching the skin on his chest and there was no burning or anything else to indicate that he was a vampire.

Relieved that one of his charges hadn't been taken, but still worried about him, he pulled Xander indoors and led him to the couch, as it was obvious that he wasn't going to make any move to do so himself.

He hadn't had much contact with Xander recently, nor with Buffy or Willow, so he had no clue as to why Xander was in such a state of despair. If he was being honest with himself he had been missing their company keenly; they had all slowly but surely found places in his heart and he wouldn't want to be without any of them given the choice. He knew that they would not see each other as often as they once did, but he didn't know how much that absence would hurt.

He could see no signs of physical injury on Xander, nor could he detect any magical traces, which meant that the problem was emotional in nature. He knew that he was no good at this sort of thing, his normal response when Buffy talked to him about personal issues was to stammer incessantly, but it was obvious that Xander was in need of emotional support and he would do his best to help.

"Xander, I know that we haven't had the kind of relationship where you felt you could talk to me about your problems," he began, trying to keep his tone as comforting as possible, "but I assure you that I have been and always will be here for you whenever you need help or just someone to talk to."

He sighs when and pauses for a moment when he realises he hasn't been there as much for Xander as he has either Buffy or Willow. "I should have said something to you way before this and I apologize that it's taken so long. I know that it is no excuse, but my father was never an open person so I am lacking somewhat in the father-son department. I might not be the most observant man on the planet, despite what my former job might have been, but I can tell that you're deeply troubled by something. Would you like to talk about it?" He knew that the question wasn't exactly original, but he simply didn't know an other way to start a conversation like this; when either Buffy or Willow wanted to talk to him about something they weren't backward in coming forward about it.

Xander sits there motionless for several moments, considering whether or not to talk. He was still reeling slightly from Giles' mini-speech; it was the first time he'd mentioned that he though of him as a son, even if it wasn't an outright statement he knew it was the truth. That more than anything else made him want to tell Giles what happened. Before he did though he needed to know if he could understand how he was feeling. "Have you ever been given what you wanted more than anything else in the world, only to have it taken away before you can enjoy it?" he asked.

Giles is confused for a moment by the question. "There have been times in my life when I believe I've felt something akin to that," he replied, "why do you ask?"

Satisfied with his answer, Xander starts explaining the situation. "I asked Buffy out Monday night."

"Oh? I thought that you had, what's the phrase, 'moved on' from your infatuation with Buffy some time ago?" he asked. He knew that Xander had asked Buffy out once before but was rejected; it showed character that he would make a second attempt.

"I had, you could say that when I came back from my road trip and saw her, it was like the first day I met her all over again." He explained.

"I see." He didn't really, but he knew Xander needed to let this out. "How did she react?"

He didn't now why, but it made Xander feel better that Giles didn't just assume she turned him down. "There was a definite surprise factor, but she wasn't sure what to say, which was an improvement on the 'no way in hell' I got last time."

"I doubt that she…" Giles was cut off from his defence of Buffy.

"I was paraphrasing Giles; Buffy was kind and let me down gently, but it still felt like I was thrown off a skyscraper on to broken glass. Anyway, I didn't want her to feel pressured into answering, so I said she had as much time as she needed."

"Very commendable, I'm sure that many would have wanted an immediate answer."

Xander smiles at Giles' praise but doesn't comment on it. "It seems she only needed 24 hours because she rang me the following evening and said yes." Even through his depression, thinking of Buffy made him smile.

"Congratulations," Giles said with an approving smile. While he might never have said it out loud, he respected Xander greatly and thought that he would be an excellent companion for Buffy, both in the day and at night.

"That's what I thought at the time," Xander said, Joyce's words constantly repeating in his head.

"Has she changed her mind?" Giles didn't like the thought of Buffy playing with Xander's feelings like that and would have serious words with her if that was the case.

"No, as far as I'm aware she's still ready willing and able to go."

"Then might I ask where the problem is?" Giles enquired, uncertain as to Xander's consternation.

"Yesterday I realised I hadn't asked for Mrs. Summers' blessing, so I went round earlier to ask."

"I doubt that Buffy need her mother's say so Xander," Giles pointed out, confused as to where this was going.

"I know that, Deadboy wouldn't have been allowed in the same hemisphere as he otherwise, but I needed it. I had to know that I wouldn't be the cause for any conflict between them," Xander explained, finding it difficult to keep his emotions in check so soon after the event.

"It's a very admirable trait Xander, there aren't many people your age who would care about that sort of thing or even think twice about it." Giles suddenly realised where this was leading and was starting to feel an anger building up. "What did she say?" he asked, fearing he knew the answer.

"To begin with she said the same as you; that she didn't need to give Buffy permission or give me her blessing. Once she realised it was important to me, she said that she couldn't give me what I wanted." Xander's voiced hitched slightly at the end as he tried desperately to stop himself from breaking down again.

Giles couldn't believe that Joyce would do such a thing to Xander, knowing from talking to her how much she cared for him. He felt like going round and laying into her for doing such a thing, but knew that it would only make things worse for him. "Did she say why?" he asked, hoping to find out why Joyce would say something that contrasted so vastly from what he expected of her.

"I didn't hang around to find out," he replied, his voice telling Giles that he had come to his own conclusions, "I ran out of the house and somehow found myself outside your door. This is all my fault."

"How can you say that?" Giles asked incredulously, unable to see how Xander had come to such a ludicrous conclusion.

"If I had asked her first everything would have been okay; I would have just found a way to get over Buffy again and things would have eventually got back to normal. Now I'm gonna have to leave Sunnydale."

"Whatever for?" he asked, worried about Xander's state of mind.

"Buffy said yes Giles; that isn't something I can ever forget, even if I wanted to. There's no way I can stay around and watch as she falls for someone else knowing that it could have been me. It hurt enough when she wasn't interested in me."

"You're going to cancel your date just because Joyce doesn't approve?" he asked, his anger at the woman increasing. She has managed to hurt him more with her words than any demon could ever hope for. He's never had the desire to strike a woman before, but he was glad that she wasn't there at that moment as he could quite easily do that and more.

"I'm used to people thinking I'm not good enough, I've been told that since before I knew what it meant, but that's always been from people that either don't know me or don't like me. Mrs. Summers likes me, I know that. She's always been willing to give me advice and has told me that I'm capable of great things if I believe in myself. She is the mother I would have picked had I been given such a choice. Even with everything and she doesn't think I'm good enough for Buffy. I can't go out with her knowing her mother doesn't think I'm good enough."

"But I do."

Both men spin round to the source of the interruption, to find Buffy and her mother standing in the doorway.


	8. Chapter 8

The Date 8

Buffy and Willow's Dorm Room,  
UC Sunnydale,  
Thursday 11th November 1999, 18:00

Buffy was just starting to get ready to go on patrol when the phone rang. She kinda hoped that it was Xander, ever since their talk on Tuesday they haven't had much time to see each other and really wanted to hear his voice God! Have I got it bad or what! .

Now that she wanted to be with him, it felt like the floodgates have been opened and the bottled up emotions she's had for him over the years are pouring out into her heart. She practically skipped everywhere she went yesterday, causing her to get a lot of stares from her classmates, but she didn't care. She was feeling happier than she had in a long time and it was all down to Xander.

It would be easy for her to start thinking that her life would have been so much easier if she had just said yes to him the first time he asked her out, but she knows that they've both changed over the years and they might not have worked out as well back then as they will now. She knows that they'll work now, she had doubts before but now she feels more certain of this than she has anything else in her life.

She had grilled Willow last night about what she and Xander talked about when they met, hoping to find out more about where they were going on their date, but was annoyed to find that Xander had kept tight lipped concerning the whole thing, only telling Willow what he had already told her. She really wanted to know why she had to take a change of clothes with her, a dozen different scenarios have gone through her head from the sublime to the ridiculous, but if she was honest with herself she wouldn't be upset if it was any of them as long as they did them together.

Picking up the phone, she tries to curb her enthusiasm a little, as she didn't want to freak him out. She's well aware how she can get when she's in the beginning of a relationship and knows she can be more than a little OTT.

"Hello, Xander?" she asked hopefully.

"No dear, it's you mother." Buffy bit back a sigh of disappointment that it wasn't her boyfriend I have a boyfriend that isn't evil or a jerk! Yay me! , especially when she hears the apprehension in her mom's voice.

"Are you okay?" she asked concerned.

"I'm fine but I'm not okay."

"You wanna vague that up a little?" her daughter asked, confused already.

"Xander just came over to ask for my blessing."

"Huh?" she asked intelligently, not sure what her mother was on about.

"He wanted me to say that it was okay for him to go out with you, he said he didn't want to cause problems between us."

"He did? That's just so sweet!" A flush of warmth goes through Buffy that Xander cared so much. It was typically Xander to ask for her blessing after he already asked her out, but she wouldn't want him any other way. This time she didn't hear the tone in her mother's voice otherwise she would have also had a sinking feeling in her stomach. "I bet it looked like his smile would split his face when you said yes; I still remember the time he called you mom by mistake when we brought him back one night after getting thrown into a gravestone. When he remembered what he said, he couldn't stop blushing for like fifteen minutes!"

While normally that memory would make her smile, but this time it only made Joyce feel worse. "Now Buffy I want you to stay calm all right?" she asked/pleaded.

Buffy didn't miss the tone in her mother's voice this time and sure enough, that sinking feeling made an appearance. "Mom, what did you do?"

"In a moment of extreme stupidity, I decided to have some fun with him and say I couldn't give him my blessing." She confessed, waiting for her daughter to erupt. She didn't have to wait long.

"YOU DID WHAT!" she roared, "How could you do that to him? Do you have any idea how highly he thinks of you! You might as well have just cut his heart out with an ice-cream scoop, it would have hurt him less that that!"

"I know, believe me I know. The moment I saw his face I knew how terribly I fucked up. I tried to tell him that I was only joking, but he had already bolted before I could say anything." she said earnestly, unable to stop herself from crying any longer.

Hearing her mother swear sucked out all the rage she was starting to feel towards her. Her mother never swore, she didn't even think she was capable of such a thing. She knew then that she was beating herself up more over this than she ever could.

She then realised that her mother just told her that Xander ran out of her house, at night, in no fit state to protect himself from the things that go bump in the night in this town. "We have to find him mom," she said, her panic quickly building, "anything could happen to him. I'm going to Giles', he'll be able to do a locating spell to find out where he is."

"What about Willow?" she asked, thinking that asking her roommate would be faster.

"She's at some Wicca group she heard about and I don't know where it's held."

"I'll meet you there," she said firmly.

"No, you stay there."

"This is my mess and I will be the one to fix it!" she shouted, needing to put right what she'd put wrong.

"I don't have time to argue with you, I'll meet you there." She puts the phone down and, after collecting a small arsenal of weaponry along with her trusty Mr. Pointy, rushes out of her dorm as fast as her Slayer enhanced body would allow.

Twenty minutes and seven vamps later, Buffy reaches her destination to find her mother waiting for her in her car. Once Joyce sees her daughter, she gets out of her car to meet her.

"Why didn't you go in and wait for me?" Buffy asked.

"I didn't want to explain to Rupert why I was here," Joyce replied, knowing full well that Rupert would have no qualms in telling her what he thought on the matter.

"I don't blame you," Buffy stated tersely, still more than a little mad at her mother. She just hoped that they can find Xander before it's too late, for both of them.

"Buffy I…"

"Xander's my priority at the moment mom, we'll talk later."

Joyce has no choice but to nod, she'd made her bed now she'd have to lie in it; she wasn't the type to run from her responsibilities or her mistakes. They make their way to his door and where Joyce was going to knock, Buffy just opens the door and find that Xander is there, talking to Giles.

"…don't know me or don't like me. Mrs. Summers likes me, I know that. She's always been willing to give me advice and has told me that I'm capable of great things if I believe in myself. She is the mother I would have picked had I been given such a choice. Even with everything and she doesn't think I'm good enough for Buffy. I can't go out with her knowing her mother doesn't think I'm good enough."

"But I do." Joyce said with as much sincerity as she could muster, causing the men to turn to face her.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Xander's reactions in this part might seem a little OOC for some. It definitely isn't the way I dealt with it (My last girlfriend's parents never liked me and actually banned me from her funeral last year. I won't go into details but I did end up going by the time I was finished.) but I think this is how Xander would react given the situation.

The Date 9 

Rupert Giles Residence,  
Sunnydale CA,  
Thursday 11th November 1999, 19:00

To say Xander was shocked would be an extreme understatement. Seeing Buffy and her mother standing in Giles' doorway filled him with equal parts happiness and dread. The happiness comes from seeing Buffy; it's the same feeling he gets whenever she is in his eye line. The dread comes from the thought that this might be the last time he sees her.

That dread lessens when Buffy races over and starts trying to squeeze the life out of him with a Slayer enhanced hug. He's never felt better in his life.

"Are you alright?" she asked him, her voice muffled due to it being pressed into the crook of his neck. The sensations he felt from that were glorious.

As Xander realises what she'd asked him, he can't help but laugh, although there was no humour in it. "There are _so_ many different ways I could answer that, depending on what you mean."

"I think I can answer that," Joyce said, trying to broach the subject on the forefront of everyone's mind.

"No offence, Joyce, but I think I've had enough answers from you for one day," he replied.

If Joyce hadn't already sat down she would have crumpled to the floor. Hearing him call her Joyce meant that she had hurt him even more than she thought and she was no longer certain that she could fix things. While she had asked Xander constantly for Xander to call her Joyce, it was more for show than anything else.

She remembered the night that Xander had called her mom; she almost cried. Not because she was upset, but because he thought so highly of her. She knew then why he had been so adamant about calling her Mrs. Summers; he couldn't call her what he wanted so he used the best alternative.

Giles had so far had kept his own council; he had been all set to lay into Joyce for the way she had treated Xander but had stopped himself when he saw Joyce's guilt ridden expression.

Joyce wasn't someone who changed her mind at the drop of a hat so seeing her so tormented about her decision didn't sit right with him. Giles knew that she would no doubt feel bad about denying Xander's request, something he still couldn't understand given her opinion of him in every other regard, but that didn't account for the sheer volume of guilt that was visible on her face and he was starting to think that things were not as clear cut as he first thought.

He knew that Xander had told him the truth; he had been in too much of a state to do anything else. That lead him to one of two conclusions; either he misinterpreted what Joyce had said to him, or for some unknown reason Joyce had said what she said in jest.

He couldn't in good conscience believe that Xander had misheard her, as something this important to him would have guaranteed his full and undivided attention. While Xander was known for a less than stellar attention span he was more than capable of focussing when necessary and his earlier discussion with Joyce would definitely have fit into that category.

That left him with the unsettling thought that Joyce would play a joke on Xander by pretending to not believe him to be a worthy companion for Buffy. He would be the first to admit that he hadn't taken a particularly active interest in Xander's well being, something that he feels more than a little guilt and shame over, but even he could see that Xander wore his heart on his sleeve. That wasn't in any way a bad thing to do, more people need to be more open with how they feel toward the people around them and he is a shining example of that, but it also means that Xander is at more risk of being hurt because of it.

If he was aware of that fact then Joyce certainly must have, which makes what he believed worse than actually meaning what she said; at least then Xander wouldn't feeling the way he did for no good reason. He could see that Xander was desperately trying not to lose control of his anger towards the woman who he still cares a great deal for, so he decides to have the conversation on his behalf.

"How did you know he would be here?" he asked the older Summers woman.

"We didn't," she managed to reply, visibly shaken by how Xander had talked to her, "after Xander left I rang Buffy to let her know what happened and she said that you might be able to perform a locator spell to find him. I guess we don't need it now."

"Why did you want to find me, to ensure I got the message? Don't worry I got it loud and clear," Xander remarked, finding it increasingly difficult not to shout at the woman. She had hurt him but hadn't really done anything wrong, and he was trying desperately to respect her opinion of him, no matter how low it was.

"That wasn't why," Buffy cut in before her mom could reply. She looked up at him and he couldn't help but smile softly at her, a smile she was more than happy to return. "When mom told me the state you were in when you left, I was worried that you would get hurt."

"I can take care of myself you know," he said to her, slightly hurt that she didn't think so. He didn't relinquish his hold on her however and nor did she.

"I know you can," she replied, squeezing him affectionately, "even if I haven't said so very often. But just as you will never stop worrying about _me_, I will never stop worrying about _you_."

"I take it you know what happened then?" he asked warily, forgetting that she hadn't let go of him the entire time she had been there.

"Yeah," she replied sadly, once again feeling disappointed in her mother for being so insensitive.

Joyce seizes on the opportunity, "I need to explain something to you Xander."

"I don't want…" Xander began only to be cut off by Giles.

"Xander, I know you're angry with Joyce at the moment, and you're perfectly justified in your anger as far as I'm concerned, but it might be wise to listen to what she has to say."

"Et tu Giles?" he asks, feeling betrayed by him.

"Absolutely not," he immediately replies, "I just feel that you need to hear her side of things. I personally cannot think of a better person for Buffy than yourself."

"Thanks Giles, that means a lot."

Buffy turns her head so she can see her de-facto Watcher. "It means a lot to me too."

"I'm glad to hear it Buffy."

Xander weighs up his options and realises that whatever she has to say can't make him feel any worse that the last thing she told him so he nods his head once in agreement. "Okay Joyce, the floor is yours."

"Basically I want to apologise. I don't know what possessed me, but when you asked me for my blessing I decided to have what I thought at the time was some fun at your expense. Instead of telling you the truth and saying that of course you had my blessing, I said the exact opposite. There is no excuse for what I did, I know I have hurt you immensely and I regret that with every fibre in my being. I just hope that you'll let me make it up to you."

Okay, maybe he was wrong about her not being able to make him feel worse. "I have to say that the thought that I've been contemplating leaving town because of an ill timed joke doesn't make me feel all that much better than believing you truly didn't want me going out with Buffy."

"I knew that the moment I said it. I've been trying to work out what made me do it and for the life of me I can't think of a single solitary reason. All I can say is that the rational part of my brain decided to take a powder at that moment. I want to assure you that I have always thought you were a lovely boy and have grown into a fine young man who I would be proud to call son. I could think of no better man, no better person, for Buffy to date than you and if it takes me forever I'll convince you of that fact. The fact that it looks like nothing sort of dynamite will get Buffy to let you go is an indication that she thinks the same thing."

Buffy and Xander look at each other and realise for the first time that they haven't let go of each other the entire time she's been there. After a moment of looking in each other's eyes, Xander simply shrugs his shoulders and keeps a hold of her, not wanting to ever let go of her while he's been given the right to hold her. Buffy is also perfectly happy where she is and can't think of a single thing that would change that.

Xander could see that she was being sincere, and he doubted that she would be as flippant about his hugging Buffy if she weren't, but part of him just couldn't believe what she was saying. He could also see how badly she felt over the situation and, given that a continued feud between himself and Joyce would only cause Buffy conflict, he decided to let the matter drop there and then, saving everyone further anguish. "Okay, I'll accept your apology and chalk this up to a misunderstanding."

Joyce was glad that he had accepted her apology, but knew that it wouldn't be as easy as that; Xander wasn't one to forgive or forget as easily as he seemed to have done and it would be a long time before they returned to where they were before their conversation this evening. She guessed Xander's quick acceptance was as much for Buffy's benefit as it was for her own peace of mind; another example of Xander putting other peoples problems above his own. She knew she had her work cut out for her to convince Xander that she was indeed telling the truth, and would follow through with what she said to him; she would make sure that he knew just how much she thought of him until the smile he sends her way is real and not a facsimile like the one he's sending her now.

Giles could also tell that Xander was not as forgiving as he was letting on, but was slightly disturbed to see how convincing he truly was. He doubted that he would have been able to tell at all if he hadn't seen how badly Xander had felt when he found him outside his door and started wondering just how many times he had pulled the same trick over the years.

While a talent like that could definitely come in handy in today's world, he was saddened to see someone so young so adept at it, knowing that he had to have gone through a lot in his short life to become that way, even worse to think that it probably had nothing to do with the supernatural.

Buffy had just realised that Xander had said he'd contemplated leaving town because of what happened and needed to talk to him alone for a while. She considered asking Giles and her mother to leave, and then remembered that they were in Giles' apartment, so that meant she had to get up and lead Xander outside. The problem she had with that was it meant she had to get up, something she'd really rather not do, but couldn't see any way out of it.

"Xand?"

"Yeah Buff?"

"Can we go outside for a minute?" she asked.

"Sure."

He began to sit up, which made Buffy change her position so that she was sitting sidesaddle on his lap but not relinquishing her hold on him. Both Giles and Joyce smile at their antics, both aware that the young couple has forgot them. Not wanting to let go just yet, Xander surprises her by picking her up and taking her outside, thinking of it as carrying her over the threshold in reverse. Once outside, he sets her down and reluctantly steps back one pace, allowing them to see each other without her craning her neck.

"So, what do you want to talk about?" he asked nervously.

"Would you really have left?" she asked, deciding to get right to the point.

"Honestly?"

"Always."

"I was leaning towards leaving, yes."

"What about us?" she asked, hurt that he would have left before giving them a chance.

Xander can see the hurt in her eyes and pulls her back into his arms, "I need you to know that I have never doubted us, never. I cherish every moment that I'm with you and I can barely think of anything else when I'm not."

"Then we leave me?" she asked in a small voice, sounding nothing like her normal confident self.

"I respect your mom a lot Buff and she's always been supportive of my decisions when my folks were ambivalent at best and derogatory at worst. I honestly thought that she'd say yes when I asked her, which was why I kinda went off the deep end when she said no. I'm not sure I could have stood seeing her disappointed look every time she saw us together. I know it would have caused problems in our relationship as well; I'd be expecting that one day you'd change your mind and start believing your was right mom about me and break up with me. I wouldn't have survived that Buffy, I wouldn't have wanted to survive that."

Buffy pulls away from him and turns around so he can't see her face. She's trying to understand his reasoning but the thought of him leaving her has left a hollow feeling in the pit of her stomach. "Would you have told me you were leaving or would you have just disappeared in the night?"

Xander steps forward and wraps his arms around her and rests his head atop hers. "I would have never left without letting you know first, I wouldn't let any of you think that something happened to me."

"Where does that leave us?" she asked, wondering if he still wanted to go on their date. His actions have said yes, but she won't believe it until she hears it from his own lips.

"As I said before, I have never doubted us. I still want there to be an us and I definitely want for us to go on our date. The question is, do you?"

She turns in his arms, the sensation causing him to shiver in a very good away. "Absolutely."

The smile that appears on his face couldn't be removed with a sledgehammer. "I want to make our date the best we've ever had. I know that it'll be mine, but seeing as this is technically my first date ever, it doesn't have a lot of competition."

"You've been on dates before Xand, I know you have."

"Not really; by the time Cordy was willing to let other people know we were together we had gone past the whole dating stage, and I don't count going to the Prom with Anya because that was two people not wanting to go alone, not two people wanting to go together. I mean, it was my fault she was in Sunnydale in the first place so she blamed me for losing her powers and decided to explain in _explicit_ detail some of the things she had done to men during her time as the Patron Saint of Scorned Women. That sort of thing just sucks all the fun out of dancing with a pretty girl."

Buffy giggles at that before a smoky look appears in her eyes. "So what you're telling me is that I'll be your first?"

"Buff, you know that F… yes, that's exactly what I'm telling you."

"I like the sound of that," she purred.

"You're not the only one." Xander swallows loudly before shaking his head a little, trying to remove the thousands of images that are passing before his eyes. "Getting back on topic, there's a slight change on what we're going to be doing tomorrow."

"Why?"

"Don't worry, I was thinking about this before this evening so it has nothing to do with what happened; someone I met during my road trip called to remind me that they still owed me one so I thought I'd collect."

"Okay, so what are we doing tomorrow and why do I need a change of clothes?" she asked, hoping that he'd give in and tell her.

"You're not getting anything out of me as to what we're gonna be doing Buff, I've been bolstering my willpower just for this occasion."

"Are you sure I can't persuade you to tell me?" she asked whiles sliding her leg up against his.

He opens and closes his mouth a couple of times, trying to start a sentence but his brain wasn't firing on all cylinders. Maybe his willpower needs a little more bolstering. "Okay I'll give you a hint, only because you need to know, not because you broke through my formidable defences."

"Whatever you say," she responded with a smile that told him she knew differently.

"You'll need to pack more than one change of clothes, because we won't be back until Sunday."

"Sunday… wait, we're going somewhere? We're not staying in Sunnydale?"

"I've been thinking about what we'd do on our first date on and off for years now Buff; it would be impossible to fit it all in to just one night."

"So…"

He cuts her off before she has a chance at finishing. "You're not getting any more out of me, no matter what you try missy."

She can tell from the look in his eyes that she could probably coax it out of him, but he really wanted to surprise her so she relented. "Fine, I'll stop, but only because I like surprises. I better go on patrol, I'll do an extra long one tonight to be on the safe side."

He relinquishes his hold on her once more, finding it more difficult to do each time. "Make sure you stake one for me."

"You got it, unless you want to come with me?" she asked, a little hope entering her voice. While she had told him earlier that she knew he could handle himself, she knows she hasn't actually shown it and wants to make up for that.

"There's nothing I'd want more than come with you… I mean there's nothing I want more than to accompany you, but I have an early start on the site tomorrow. Don't worry about your mom, I'll ask Giles to escort her home; normally I'd do it, but…"

"No need to explain, I understand." She knew that it would take time for him to feel comfortable around her mom again and won't push him into doing anything he doesn't want to. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Count on it."


	10. Chapter 10

**The Date 10**

**Buffy and Willow's Dorm Room,  
UC Sunnydale  
Friday 12th November 2000, 20:59**

Xander has been standing outside Buffy's door for the last ten minutes, trying his hardest to calm down. He has never felt so nervous in all his life; this was it, his one chance to show Buffy that he was worthy of her love and he was worried that he'd do something to ruin it.

His watch beeps, indicating that it was show time, so he knocks three times and waits for someone to answer. He doesn't have to wait long as the door swings open to reveal Willow standing there with a large smile on her face.

"Hey Xander, you look great!" she said with surprise in her voice.

Xander couldn't really blame her for being surprised, until recently his dress sense was… eclectic is probably the best way to put it. His summer in Oxnard fixed a lot of his fashion faux pas, as the other strippers had graciously taken pity on him and shown him how to dress properly, instead of Cordelia's less effective approach of browbeating him into submission.

His midnight blue button down shirt, dark grey slacks, black leather ankle boots and his now ever-present brown leather jacket make up his current attire. While he still can't see the point in dressing like that, he does finally realise that women prefer it to his less conventional wardrobe.

"Thanks Wills, you don't half bad yourself, those Hair Bear Bunch jammies really brings out your eyes." Willow looks down and realises he wasn't joking and starts to blush furiously. "Don't worry about it Wills, you know you always look good to me."

As he smiles at the slight blush that appears on his oldest friends face, a voice floats through the bathroom door. "Flirting with another woman and we haven't even started our date yet, not a good start Xand."

"It's not flirting, it's…" Xander trails off as he sees Buffy emerges from the bathroom. While Xander would admit to finding her beautiful even if she were wearing a flour sack, Buffy looks exceptional tonight. Her hair is down, flowing with a slight curl to it. A teal halter tie neck top with gold print and a mocha tiered skirt accentuates her every curve. Brown suede wedge heeled boots finish off the outfit and there's only one word that fits the way she looks: perfection.

Buffy stands there for a few second before she realises that Xander has become dumbstruck. While she loves the fact that she can do that to him, it doesn't stop her from teasing him about it. "Wow, a speechless Xander, I never thought I'd see the day."

Her good-natured dig at his lack of verbal skills snaps him out of his Buffy-induced trance and smiles warmly at her. "You look spectacular Buff, I mean it."

"Well thank you, you don't look bad yourself," she complimented. She wasn't lying either; she'd almost said a very uncharacteristic '_damn_!', but had managed to curb that particular thought. It's amazing how good someone can look to you when your ears don't bleed from what they're wearing.

They look deeply into each other's eyes and Willow guesses that if she doesn't do something they'll stay like that for a while. "So, where are you taking Buffy on this date then Xander?" Willow asked him, half to break the spell and half because she's frustrated that she didn't already know.

"I'll never tell," he sing-songed in reply.

"Don't make me bring out my Resolve Face Xander, you know I'll do it."

He smiles at her, but shakes his head. "Won't work this time Wills, I'm working on a strictly need to know policy and you, my dear redheaded Wicca friend, don't need to know."

Willow is feeling a little hurt that Xander is keeping all this from her. It wasn't so long ago that they would tell each other everything, without even having to ask. Now she wouldn't be surprised if she knew a fraction of what he did these days, the same going for him to. She just hoped that they could get that closeness back, or at least get closer than they are at the moment.

"You can't just disappear for a couple of days without letting anyone know where you are," she countered.

"We're not," he replied, "I've left contact details with Giles and Buffy's mom with strict instruction to only use them in a _real_ emergency, which means you don't get your itty bitty hacker mitts on them I'm afraid."

"Are you suggesting that I would try and use less than legal means to find out where you're going?" she asked, trying her hardest to look scandalised.

"Yep," he answered.

"Just checking."

Buffy watches the byplay between her two closest friends and can't help but smile. The last time they had all been in the same room together and not surrounded by opened demonology books was before graduation. It felt good to be together for something so… un-Hellmouthy.

While Xander could happily tease Willow more, the combination of excitement and anxiousness he was feeling easily came out on top. Standing up a little straighter and smoothing out the non-existent creases in his clothing, he extends his hand to his date, unable to prevent the grin that appears at the thought.

"So, you ready to get this show on the road my lady?" he asks in his best chivalrous voice. That's not to say he sounded all that chivalrous, it was just the best he could do.

"Absotively posalutely kind sir," she replied, taking his offered hand and moving closer to him. Without thinking, Xander brings her hand to his lips and kisses her fingertips, the simple action causing a shiver to go down her spine and not in a bad way.

Willow takes in the picture of the two, standing side by side with their hands entwined, a little surprised by how right it looked. While she had been able to see in their eyes when she spoke to them both that they both felt more for each other than they were willing to say, she hadn't seen them together before tonight so she hadn't been able to truly picture them together. Now she has, she's having trouble seeing them any other way. "You two have fun you hear."

"You got it Wills," Xander enthusiastically replied, "I assure you that the having of the fun will occur for the both of us."

"Well you better, or I'll have to think of an appropriate punishment if you don't," she threatened.

"You could sing 'The Hills Are Alive' to me again like you did when we were ten. I think it took Jesse months to get over the trauma."

This time the scandalised look on her face is real; no one makes fun of her singing and gets away from it. Especially her singing songs from the bestest musical in the whole entire world. "Anymore backchat and I'll re-enact the entire musical and force you to sing the Christopher Plummer parts."

"I'll take that under advisement," he said in a small voice, knowing that she would and could make good on her threat. Xander needs a change of topic stat so he looks down to Buffy, "where are your bags?"

"Behind you."

He turns round to find five bags piled up against the wall. He turns back to look at her, "You do know we'll be back for Christmas don't you?"

"You wouldn't tell me where we're going so I had to make sure I had an outfit for an occasion."

"It looks like you're bringing an outfit for _every_ occasion."

"I won't need to bring as much if you tell me what we…"

He cuts her off, realising that she was trying to get more info out of him. "If a bad back is the price I have to pay to surprise you, then so be it." He reluctantly lets go of her hand so he can pick up her bags, wondering when he does so if one or more are filled with rocks instead of clothes. He considers commenting on it, but the self-preservation part of his brain kicks in and keeps his mouth shut. "Okay, lets get this show on the road before my knuckles start dragging on the carpet."

Buffy rolls her eyes affectionately at him before turning to Willow and pulling her into a hug. "I'll see you in a couple of days."

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

"That leaves me with a _lot_ of scope," she teased.

"Right, that's it, both of you get out before I do something we'll all regret."

"I'll ring you tomorrow." Willow nods before putting on her Resolve Face and shooing them out.

**Alessandro's  
Sunnydale, CA  
Friday 12th November 1999, 21:45**

As Xander and Buffy look through their menus, he starts thinking that he is way out of his depth at the moment. The closest he's ever some to eating at a proper restaurant was when he stayed with his cousin Jesse for a couple of days in LA and he took him to his own restaurant BBQ Bob's. To say that it didn't really prepare him would be the understatement of understatements.

Alessandro's was the most exclusive restaurant in Sunnydale and the only way he was able to get a reservation before his fiftieth birthday and a full credit check was due to knowing the boss' son, well he used to anyway. Malcolm McNally opened Alessandro's a few months after Jesse's 'disappearance' and has spent almost every waking moment making it the best it could be. Jesse's mom had died during childbirth and Malcolm never remarried so he took care of Jesse all by himself. Malcolm has always thought that Katherine, Jesse's mom, was his one true love and no one had ever come close to proving him otherwise so he had stayed single.

Xander had kept in touch with him as much as he could over the years, the guilt of knowing what happened to Jesse and never being able to tell his father made him feel obligated in a way to ensure that he was okay. They had been talking a few weeks ago when he had mentioned his intention to ask Buffy out on a date and wanting it to be special; Malcolm had told him in no uncertain terms that there would always be a table available to him whenever he wanted it he simply had to ask. He had also been dead set against Xander paying for anything, but Xander had managed to haggle him up to it being more of a discount than a freebie.

Living mainly on pizza and Chinese food, compliments of the local take out joints, Xander hadn't had much experience in Italian food. When his mom had remembered what a supermarket was he'd been given the privilege of a TV lasagne or spaghetti and meatballs dinner, both he found edible, so his first instinct was to just order on or the other. Tonight however was supposed to be about firsts so he started to actually look at the menu instead of the pretending he had been doing.

When he did, he thought he'd have a heart attack when he saw that it was written in Italian; his Spanish was okay and so was his German, his grandparents on his mother's side escaped from Germany to America during WWII and taught him the language when he was young, but his Italian was limited to what he'd heard in the mob films he'd seen over the years. He'd breathed a silent sigh of relief when he saw the English description in small print under the Italian and decided on Chicken Alfredo.

He looked over his menu at Buffy and smiled at her as she looked up. She smiled in return before returning to her own menu. He had to admit that she looked in her element; it was as though she was born to experience the best that life had to offer. While he'd dearly want to provide her with that, he knew that things like this would be few and far between. He didn't really think that was a bad thing; he'd seen what happens to people who get used to the finer things in life and didn't want to become like that.

He could tell that Buffy was having a good time and so was he, but was starting to worry about one thing; so far the night itself had gone off without a hitch, he hadn't embarrassed himself yet which was always a good thing, but he felt that there was something missing. The problem was that it didn't feel like two people out on a date, it felt like two friends out to dinner. It wasn't as though he expected for them to be all over each other and profess their mutual undying love, but he had hoped that their date would actually feel like one instead of feeling like every other time he had spent the evening with Buffy.

Unbeknownst to Xander, Buffy was thinking along similar lines. So far she was enjoying herself immensely, as she always did in Xander's company, but the evening was lacking something to make it truly feel like a date. She definitely wasn't having second thoughts, she was as sure of her decision now as she was when she made it. Her best guess was that even though they both wanted more from their relationship, they've been friends so long that it was difficult for them to make the transition from the platonic relationship they have now, to the romantic relationship they both desire.

If she was with anyone else she's probably not say anything and hope for the best, but she wasn't with anyone else, she was with Xander and he was too important to her to just let things work themselves out. She was going to do something she's never done before and actually talk about her feelings when they first come up instead of letting them fester and grow out of proportion.

"Xander?" she asked hesitantly.

"Yeah Buff?" he replied, putting down his menu so he could giver his full attention to her.

"I don't want you to think that I'm not enjoying myself, because I am, but…"

"But what?" he asked, cutting her off.

"I'm not feeling like this is a date. Do you get what I mean? I know we're on a date, a date that I want to be on, but it feels like something is missing."

"Yeah, I know what you mean. I thought it was just me. What do you think it means?" he asked with trepidation, fearing that she might be taking it as a sign that they weren't meant to be anything more than friends.

"I'm not having second thoughts Xander," she said to him, obviously able to see the worry in his voice.

"I never said that you were," he replied quickly.

"No, but you were thinking it," she said with a small smile. "That's probably part of the problem; we know each other so well that the 'getting to know you' stage that occurs on a first date isn't necessary. We're acting more like an established couple than two people on their first date and it's putting us off. We're not sure how to act so we're acting like we always do, as friends."

"So what do you suggest?"

Buffy stands up and for one terrifying moment Xander thinks she might be leaving, but relaxes as she moves round so that she's sitting to his right instead of across from him. She takes his hand in her own and smiles warmly at him, "this is much better, don't you think?" she asked softly.

"I think that you are a bona fide genius Ms. Summers."

"Nice to have someone finally notice."

Before Xander can say anything more, a waiter approaches their table. "Excuse me sir, madam, but are you ready to place your order?"

They look at each other and nod in agreement, Xander indicating for Buffy to go first. "Yeah, um, I think I'll have the lasagne."

Xander manages to repress his smile at her choice and decides to follow suit and order the same. This may be a time for firsts, but there was no need to push his luck.

**Sunnydale Airport  
Sunnydale, CA  
Friday 12th November 1999, 23:30**

As Xander turns off the ignition of his car, he can't help but feel excited. After the small bump in the road at the beginning of dinner, things have been going from strength to strength; they had spent dinner talking and getting to know each other all over again, this time without any doubts that it was indeed a date they were on.

The dinner became a little sombre when Malcolm came over and spoke to them, Xander introducing Buffy to him. He squeezed her hand gently in support when her breath caught slightly when she realised who he was. There have been many people that they've been unable to help, but Jesse was the first and was the catalyst for both he and Willow joining her in her fight against the darkness. He knows that she doesn't really remember him, nor would he expect her to as she only spent a couple of minutes with him that first day and he was taken that night, but she still feels guilty for not getting to him in time. So does he.

He managed to return the lightness to the dinner with a few well placed jokes, mainly at his own expense, and by the time they left for their next destination he was feeling better than he had in a long, long time. Buffy must have been feeling pretty happy herself, because when he suggested that she put on the blindfold she now adorns she simply nodded and not threatened to remove body parts or insert inanimate objects into body parts.

He gets out of the car and goes round to the passenger side and opens the door for her. "Come on Buff, we're here."

"I guessed that when you stopped the car and got out without saying anything."

The tone in her voice quickly tells Xander that her patience is wearing a little thin not that she has a lot in the first place he thinks to himself. After helping her out of the car and standing her in front of it, he removes the blindfold. She blinks a couple of times to adjust to the lack of light and a confused look appears on her face.

"Xander, why are we at the airport?" she asked.

"Why would anyone go to an airport Buff?" he responded, not wanting to give anything away.

Buffy could tell that she wasn't going to get a straight answer from him, so she tries a different route. "Okay… where are we going?"

"On a plane."

"And where is the plane going?"

"In the air."

"Xander…" she growled.

"Is anything I said untrue?" he asked with faux innocence, knowing the he was annoying her.

"Well, no, but…"

"So why are you getting annoyed?" he asked in the same 'I'm so innocent' tone.

"You know, I really do like the way you look, but I'm starting to wonder what you'd look like if I swapped your arms and legs round," she said to him in an eerily calm voice, a voice that tells you that she wasn't exaggerating in any way shape or form.

"Okay, okay, you win," he said, knowing that he'd reached the end of her tolerance. "One of these days I'll cure you of your compulsion to threaten me with violence whenever things don't go your way you know."

"Not before I cure you of your tendency to annoy me enough that threats of violence become necessary."

Knowing that wasn't a conversation he'd win even if he were right, he decided to change the subject. "If you must know, we're going to LA."

"Why?"

"I'll tell you when we get there, deal?"

Buffy thinks about it for a few moments. She hates not knowing what they're going to be doing, but at the same time it's also exhilarating to just go with the flow. The clincher was knowing how badly Xander wants to surprise her, and how much she likes the fact that he wants to. "Deal."

"Good," he replied while taking the bags out of the trunk, "now lets get going before the plane leaves without us."

"When does the flight leave?" she asked, suddenly worried they might miss it.

"When we do," he responded whilst walking towards the airport entrance, "it's a private jet. I was just saying that as a figure of speech."

Hearing that brings her to a stop for a moment before catching up to him. "Don't take this the wrong way, but how can you afford to charter a private jet?"

"I can't."

"Then how did you get it?" she asked, a little worried about the answer. She knew how much he wanted to make their date special, but she hoped that he wouldn't resort to less than legitimate means. She didn't want him to think that he had to go out of his to impress her.

"I'll tell you on the plane."

She stops and grabs his shoulder to stop him as well, spinning him round to face her. "You'll tell me _now_ Xander."

Carrying the six travel bags has altered his centre of balance and he almost topples from the momentum of them swinging around. Once he's sure that he won't taste asphalt, he stares her intently for a beat or two before speaking. "Do you trust me?" he asked.

"Absolutely," she immediately responded, not even having to think about it.

Xander smiles despite himself at the speed and conviction of her answer. "Then I'll tell you on the plane, I swear."

She looks at him for a second before nodding and continuing on her way, Xander following closely behind her huffing slightly.

**ON THE PLANE**

Buffy looks round the interior of the jet and is visibly impressed, "This is very nice, all mod cons I see."

"I wouldn't doubt it," Xander said, also impressed.

Buffy waits as long as she can, about five seconds, before asking the question grating on her. "Okay, I'm on the plane so spill already."

"But I haven't got a drink yet."

"If you don't start talking so help me I'll…"

He cuts her off with a laugh, "Alright already. You know I told you I got a reminder from someone I met on my road trip that they owed me one?"

"Yeah."

"Well they're the one, well her father is actually, but either way they helped me arrange a few things, this jet being one of them. You see, one night in Oxnard I was walking back to my motel after work when I saw this girl being attacked. I went over to help and found that it was a vamp attacking her, so I dusted it and escorted her to where she said she was meeting her friends, waiting with her until they showed up. Before she left with them I gave her my number…"

"_What_!" she shouted at him, upset that he gave his number to some strange woman that she'd never met and was no doubt a demon of some sort.

"She didn't believe the generic 'it was a mugger' story we normally use when we save someone from a vamp. I told her that if she wanted to live a simple life she'd forget what she'd seen, but she wouldn't so I gave her my number in case she needed someone to talk to about it that wouldn't sling her in a straitjacket and throw her in a nice padded cell."

She really didn't want to, but she could understand why he did what he did; her own brush with a mental institution making her sympathetic to those that try to explain the unexplainable. "I still don't see why you had to give her your number."

He might not ever be mistaken for Sherlock Holmes, but it didn't take the world's greatest detective to detect the jealousy in Buffy's voice. He can't help but feel happy that he is able to conjure such feelings in her, even if it made him appear in a less than brilliant light. Of course, jealousy is seen as a fear of future loss and he wanted to assure her that he wasn't going anywhere unless it was with her. "I didn't find her attractive Buff, I simply wanted to help her out. I'm not interested in her or anyone else; there's only one woman for me."

Buffy really didn't want to smile at his declaration, but she couldn't help herself. "And they are?" she asked.

"If you have to ask you're not ready to know," he answered.

"And if I _was_ ready to know?"

"You wouldn't need to ask."

The intensity in his eyes and the conviction in his voice tells is a little overwhelming and she suddenly has no idea what to say. While he hasn't said anything, she realises that Xander's feelings towards her run far deeper than she expected. The thing she isn't sure about is whether she feels overwhelmed because he feels that way or that she feels the same. She wasn't ready to think about it either way, at least not yet, so she changes the topic. "So, why are we going to LA?"

Xander could feel the tension between them and knew that he might have gone too far too soon. When he look at Buffy however he didn't believe she was uncomfortable with what he said, but was simply shocked at the suddenness of it. When she changes the topic he decides to go along with it, knowing that the ball was in her court now. He wasn't willing to ruin everything by pushing the envelope. "As I said before, I'll tell you when we get there and that's just what I'll do."

"Okay," she said, knowing that she wouldn't get anymore out of him about it, "where are we staying then?"

"Somewhere her dad owns," he said evasively, trying to keep it a surprise.

"And that is?" she asked.

"The Beverly Hilton."


	11. Chapter 11

**The Date 11**

**A Limousine  
Los Angeles CA  
Saturday 13th November 1999, 10:45**

Right now Buffy was a very happy camper. This wasn't her first experience of a limousine, but it was by far her best. That could be something to do with the Xander-shaped pillow she was using at the moment whilst watching cartoons on the small TV screen in front of them.

If she weren't feeling so good, she'd probably be worried by how good she felt. Forgetting the fact she's known Xander for years, it's been less than a week since that evening that he asked her out, less than a week since she started seeing him as anything other than a friend. Her experience in this field isn't exactly extensive, hell apart from Angel she had never had a boyfriend for longer than a couple of weeks at a time, but she'd never felt so much for one person in so short a time.

There wasn't any one thing she can point out and say 'that's what's making me feel this way'; it simply boils down to the fact that being around him made her feel good and the longer she was around him the better she felt.

Last night she had enjoyed herself more than she had in a long time; the meal was great if a little bittersweet when she met Jesse's dad, but it was like a drop in the ocean and hadn't affected her enjoyment of the evening. The food was excellent and the company even better.

One thought that kept going through her mind was how she missed just how handsome Xander was. Unless he had extensive reconstructive surgery on his road trip, his appearance hadn't changed much in the past three years so she must have just been blind. Of course there have been many things that she has never really noticed about Xander before, whether as a friend or potential boyfriend, but dwelling on that would only start to put a dampener on everything so she stops thinking like that and thinks about the plane ride.

The bar inside the jet was well stocked, not surprising to her considering who owned it, but neither of them even felt the slightest urge for anything stronger than soda. She couldn't speak for Xander, but she's always seen alcohol as a way of loosening up and lowering your inhibitions, something that she definitely didn't need.

Before her parents had split up, they had normally had at least two family holidays overseas a year so she was a veteran of air travel. She doubted the same could be said for Xander, who had tried valiantly to hide the apprehension he had been feeling as the jet prepared for take off, or the way he clenched the arm rests as the went through a spot of turbulence.

She had distracted him as best she could, which wasn't very difficult as Xander barely took his eyes off her the entire flight, and they had soon touched down in LA. She had suppressed a smile when she heard Xander breathe a sigh of relief when they had landed, knowing that it wouldn't be fair for her to make light of his nervousness, especially when he was going through it for her.

It was there that she met the girl that Xander saved. There was a limo a lot like the one they were in right now waiting for them when they got off the jet, two people standing alongside it.

When he said that her father owned the hotel, she thought he was joking. When she found out that it was Paris Hilton that he'd saved, that jealousy she felt on the plane came rushing back. It didn't help that she started fawning all over him the moment he got out of the limo, it looked like she'd need a crowbar to pry her off him.

She also had several other ideas on how to deal with the ska… woman, but she doubted that Xander would be too happy if she spent the rest of their date, not to mention her life, behind bars. If it weren't for the fact that Xander was ignoring or unaware of her flirting, she doubts that her resolve would have held.

Her father had managed to pry her off him eventually so things had calmed down slightly, having Xander put his arm around her had helped a great deal. After the introductions were over and Rick (Paris' father insisted they call him that) had thanked Xander for saving his 'little girl', something that had made Xander quite bashful, they got into the limo and made their way to the hotel. They had made small talk on the way there, and once they reached their destination Rick and Paris stayed in the limo and went wherever Hiltons go, and left them in the able hands of the concierge, Peter.

Now Peter reminded her a lot of Smithers from the Simpsons, as he was the sycophant's sycophant. The moment he saw who they arrived with, she was sure that he would have eagerly licked their shoes had they asked him within moments of them stepping through the doors. He had bowed and scraped his way over to them, almost physically dragging a couple of porters with him to collect their bags.

She couldn't help but smile at the look of happiness on Xander's face when he realised he didn't have to carry all their bags to their room. She could have carried them with ease and he knew it, but that would have caused more than a few people to raise an eyebrow at them. She knows that he wouldn't really have minded if she had, he'd gotten over any insecurities he might have had concerning her being stronger than him long ago, but she didn't want to show him up.

As they were being led to their room, she started to realise that she knew as much about where they were staying as Xander. Her observational skills may need fine tuning from time to time, but seeing the look of pure unbridled shock as he gazed round the penthouse suite they'd been escorted to was more than enough evidence, even for her.

The suite looked amazing, which is understandable as a shabby looking suite really wouldn't do the hotel's reputation any good, but the suite paled in comparison to the expression on Xander's face as she watched him explore where they'd be staying the next couple of nights. It was like watching a kid in a candy store; a look she had only seen on his face twice before; once when they really were in a candy store, the other time was when she opened her eyes in the Master's lair.

It was of course Xander who first noticed the large double bed, and the fact that it was the only bed in the suite. Xander had immediately stated that he could sleep on the couch, making her smile at his considerateness, before she stated that they were adults and could share the bed. If she had only had a camera when she saw his face. He started trying to assure her that he had nothing to do with the room choice, obviously worried that she was thinking he was being presumptuous, but she smiled at him and said that she knew he wouldn't do something like that. She decided not to tell him that the couch pulled out into another bed; it would have spoiled the moment.

Once that had been settled and unpacked their things, they decided to relax for a while on the balcony and enjoy the view before turning in. She wasn't feeling all that tired but Xander informed her they had an early-ish start the next day so she had, reluctantly, agreed.

The logistics of getting ready for bed weren't that bad, Xander being gracious enough to let her use the bathroom first, and it wasn't long before they were both in bed. She had been surprised by how quickly she had fallen asleep, one minute she was watching the steady rise and fall of his chest and the next minute she could feel the first rays sun hitting on her face.

She had been happy that she hadn't woken up in the clichéd position of in his arms, only so they didn't start the day feeling awkward than anything else. Not that she'd mind having the warmth of his arms around her and hearing the almost hypnotic beating of his heart, she just knew that they weren't quite at the 'cuddling in bed' stage of their relationship. Hell, they weren't even 24 hours into their relationship.

What had surprised her was that Xander wasn't there when she turned her head to face him; he was actually on the floor doing sit-ups. Xander 'I get all the exercise I need from lifting Twinkies' Harris was doing sit-ups. When he had seen her surprise, and after saying good morning, he had explained that he had got in the habit of doing a few push-ups and sit-ups during his stint in Oxnard.

That of course triggered a lot of thoughts to start flashing in front of her eyes, making her to zone out for a few seconds and causing Xander to get worried and get up to check on her. She covered her lapse of concentration by asking where they were going, forgetting to ask last night.

When he told her they were going to Universal Studios Hollywood, she was pleasantly surprised. It had been a long time since she had gone to an amusement park and even though she used to live in LA, she never went to there. She was going to enjoy kicking back and not worrying about anything slayer related and simply be Buffy Summers.

After they both showered and changed, they went down and had breakfast before Xander went to call a cab. When he came back, he had a bemused smile on his face as he told her that Rick had arranged for them to have the services of a limousine for the day, to take them wherever they want for however long they want. Five minutes later, they were in the limo and on their way.

The cartoon ends, Jerry once again besting Tom in their never-ending game of literal cat and mouse, she looks out of the tinted window and spots that they're at their destination. She's surprised by the amount of cars that are waiting to get in, she knew that it was a popular attraction but it wasn't exactly peak tourist season.

"Are you sure we'll get in?" she asked her living pillow, indicating to the long cue of cars.

"Of course Buff," he'd replied, "the adrenaline portion of the date will be met by such attractions as Terminator2: 3-D, Back to the Future – the Ride and lets not forget the world famous studio tour."

She can't help but smile at his enthusiasm. "Are you sure you've never been?"

"Yup, Jesse and his dad went once and they had asked me to go, but as I was leaving Tony decided to be lucid enough to notice and decided that my Saturday was much better spent cleaning out the basement. It only took him six years to think of a reason why."

Before Buffy could think of a reply to another glimpse of Xander's less than happy childhood, a firm tapping on Xander's passenger side window startles them both. Buffy quickly moves away from Xander as though it was an ingrained response, causing Xander to feel the loss of warmth keenly and wonder whether he'd get away with knocking whoever it was at the window's teeth out. Xander rolls down the window and they see that it's a parking attendee.

"Excuse me sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to turn back."

"Why?" he asked, finding the urge to rip out the guys tongue harder to resist.

"There was a fire late last night and there has been some structural damage to the public access way to the lower lot. It would be unsasfe for us to open until everything has been checked. You will of course be entitled to a full refund and we at Universal Studios Hollywood give our sincere apologies for any and all inconvenience this has caused. Have a nice day," the man said, sounding apologetic and bored at the same time. They guessed it wasn't the first time he's had to say that. The man walks off, leaving a very silent Xander and a nervous looking Buffy.

Buffy was nervous because it didn't bode well to have a silent Xander, it was against God's law or something. She could count the amount of times he had been this silent and still conscious on one hand and they generally ended with badness.

Xander was silent because he was wracking his brains trying to work out how to salvage the day. He hadn't thought of any alternate places to go, as he didn't believe there was a need. Boy, was he wrong about that.

He knew things were going too smoothly, last night had been wonderful and waking up with Buffy lying next to him was the stuff of dreams. Even with the snoring and the little bit of drool leaking from the side of her mouth, he had never seen anyone as divine. She was as stunning without make up as she was with it, not that she used a lot in the first place, but he found her natural beauty more alluring and had to resist the urge to capture her lips with his own. He might be old fashioned, but when they do finally kiss he wanted her to be conscious.

He was completely drawing a blank on what they could do today, when on the TV comes a promo for a showing of Police Academy 7: Mission to Moscow. A smile begins to appear on his face as he has a brainwave.

"Alright," he said, causing Buffy to jump and look at him warily, "this was more than a little unexpected, not to mention disappointing, but it's not the end of the world. I mean, we both know what the end of the world looks like and this is not it, right?"

"Um, right." Buffy had no idea what Xander was going on about, but the fact he was talking again made her feel a lot better. She was a little disappointed that they couldn't get in to the park, she was really looking forward to riding in the Delorian, but that wasn't as important to her as the person in the limousine sitting next to her.

Xander knocks on the divide between them and Gerry the chauffeur. "Hey Gerry?"

"Yes sir?" Gerry responded, his accent a dead give away that he was from Australia.

"Please, call me Xander."

"Yes sir."

Xander could tell that there was no chance in hell of Gerry calling him anything else, so he just sighs and to the point. "You know your way LA right?" he asked.

"Yes sir, I'd find it difficult to do my job otherwise sir."

"Um, right, of course. Well I need you to take us to 129 Vanowen St. I just hope that the good doctor is in."

"Doctor sir? Are you in need of medical assistance?" Gerry queried, worried that he'd get in trouble with his boss if one of his passengers gets ill on his watch.

"No, I'm actually in need of some family assistance."


	12. Chapter 12

**A Beach,  
Los Angeles CA.,  
Saturday 13th November 1999,  
17:45.**

As he looked out onto the ocean, Xander was doing something that he hadn't felt he'd been able to do for quite some time.

Relax.

While on the outside he'd looked calm and collected to his friends, for the most part anyway, he had in fact been under a terrible amount of stress ever since he came back from his road trip, and if he were being honest with himself, even before that.

His worries about possibly losing touch with the two people that meant the most to him, working in an environment where the days were long, arduous and where the shadow of his father coloured his co-workers and bosses perception of him, living in his parents basement because they'd turned his old room into a distillery in his absence, and dealing with the resurfaced feelings he had for one Buffy Anne Summers had all been taking it's toll on the young man, and he would readily admit that he'd been weeks away from total burn out.

It was only his dogged determination to, as his 'uncle' Templeton would say, not let the bastards grind him down, that had allowed him to keep it together for as long as he had.

The upshot to his hard work and determination was that he'd impressed his bosses with his work ethic, something that many at the company had been worried about given that they knew who his father was, and had been given a raise in pay and more responsibilities to match. He'd been unable to wipe the face-splitting grin off for a whole two hours when he'd been told, feeling a tremendous amount of pride at succeeding in something without any assistance from anyone.

His turn of luck seemed to continue when he'd also managed to start rebuilding his relationship with Willow, something that he'd had doubts over given how things had been left before his road trip, which also helped to lift much of the weight off his shoulders that had been there since the whole 'fluking' incident had come to light.

He still hadn't talked that through with her, and while it was most definitely water under the bridge for both him and her, he still felt they needed to clear the air over the whole thing. He also wanted to talk to Oz about it, hoping that he wouldn't get punched this time by the silent but surprisingly deadly guitarist, if only to ensure that there was no residual anger or resentment.

While those improvements were significant and made his life feel more complete, the most significant and, in some ways, most important consequence was that they'd given his confidence enough of a boost to find the courage required to put his heart on the line again and try to further his relationship with Buffy beyond the platonic boundaries that had been in place for so long. He'd done whatever he could to ensure that he didn't get his hopes up, but still found himself barely able to breathe while waiting for her answer and practically floated on a cloud when she'd said yes.

The incident with Joyce and her ill-timed attempt at humour was completely unexpected and had, not surprisingly in hindsight, efficiently broken through all of his emotional defences, but had in a strange sort of way turned out to be a good thing. Not only had it allowed him to release a lot of the emotional pressure he'd attained over the last few months, but it had also proven unequivocally to him that Buffy was as committed to seeing whether they could have a relationship as more than friends as he was.

A flash of guilt swept through him as he remembered her saddened expression that night upon hearing his thoughts of leaving town. There were times it seemed when, no matter what you try, you couldn't help but hurt the ones you love. He only hoped that he wouldn't make a habit out of it, as it hurt him as much as did her.

The lady in question was currently enjoying the oceanic view with him, her head in his lap while he threaded his fingers through her hair. While he'd admit to having a dream or two concerning Buffy that weren't for public consumption, the vast majority were about the simple things like this: being able to simply enjoy each other's company. That was how the feelings he had for Buffy now differed to the ones he'd had when he first met her.

While he knew that his feelings for her were as real back then as they are now, most of his dreams concerning her the first time round had been of a sexual nature, and had never really dwelled on the actual relationship aspect of things. It might have been due to the fact that he hadn't really thought he'd had much of a chance with her despite his asking her to the dance, or that he had been lacking any experience of what a relationship was really like, or that he simply had too many hormones coursing through his body back then to think of anything else, but most of his thoughts were based around what he'd do to her instead of with her.

Whatever the reasons why, he was glad of them now, as the difference in his feelings for Buffy then and now were one of the deciding factors on risking rejection a second time. They had proven to him that his feelings now were more rounded, more ready for a lasting relationship with her, the only type of relationship he'd consider risking their existing relationship over.

He was now actually glad that he and Buffy hadn't got together the first time round, as he was almost positive that if they had, they would most definitely not be together now, and that the friendship they both cherished would have withered and died in the aftermath. That revelation had initially been a bitter pill to swallow, as he could remember he'd spent a lot of time thinking quite the opposite at the time, but he had come to learn over the years that harsh truths like that were generally the most significant.

As he watched the sun begin to make its daily decline beyond the horizon, he found himself actually glad that his previous plans for the day had been cancelled. He knew that, had they been able to get in to Universal Studios, they would have had a blast, but he doubted that he would have had the same opportunity to chill out, which he now knew that he had needed.

His cousin Jesse had been as helpful as he'd hoped when they had knocked on his door this morning, and the fact that his cousin and Buffy had got on like a house on fire from the moment he had introduced them only made things all the sweeter for him. It was a good thing that Jesse wasn't at work, as he doubted that Buffy would have enjoyed going to Community General Hospital to see him, given her aversion to those places.

After talking with his cousin for an hour and a half, something Buffy had used to good use by getting Jesse to tell her some of Xander's more embarrassing childhood stories, he'd borrowed Jesse's surfboard and decided to teach Buffy how to surf. Xander had remembered talking to her when they went to a beach party during the whole swim team debacle, where she'd admitted that, despite living in LA all her life, she'd never tried surfing.

He could understand it really; if everyone who lived in Los Angeles surfed, there wouldn't be any room in the ocean for the fish. He himself hadn't surfed since he was twelve but, like riding a bike, it wasn't something you easily forgot and his years of skateboarding had helped to keep his skills somewhat fresh.

After stopping off at a nearby surf shop to buy the appropriate attire, an activity he had enjoyed immensely when Buffy had insisted that she model several different swimsuits for him, and informing Gerry that he could come back for them at nightfall, they had made their way to the private beach that Jesse's boss Mark had said they could use. Xander had quickly gone through the basics with the blonde and, within an hour, Buffy was showing the skills of a true natural, although he had a sneaking suspicion that she'd had some help from her inner Slayer.

Between surfing, getting roped into a gender versus gender volleyball match that had been one-sided the moment Buffy stepped onto the court, and helping a lifeguard by the name of Mitch by 'accidentally' tripping up a purse snatcher he'd been chasing, the time had flown by and they had decided on watching the sunset to rest a little before going on to dinner.

They both felt strange to enjoy the setting of the sun, as it usually meant that it was time to prepare for patrol and therefore something they rarely looked forward to. Because of that, neither one had truly appreciated the beauty of it, the connotations of what they did after dark tarnishing the natural wonder that so many enjoyed.

As the last of the sun disappeared from view, it signalled that it was time to depart. Looking down, he saw that Buffy had her eyes closed, but he could tell that she was still awake. He had seen what she looked like asleep this morning and, while she definitely looked rested, she didn't have that look of tranquillity that had almost been too much to resist.

"Buffy, it's time to go," he told her quietly, as though talking too loud would ruin the moment.

"Do we have to?" she sighed, turning so that she now faced him.

"Afraid so," he replied, brushing a lock of her hair away from her face so he had an unobstructed view, tucking it behind her ear.

It was still so surreal to him that he could do things like that with her now and not end up in the ER, although now he truly knew how it felt, he thought it would be worth it even if he couldn't.

"You make a good pillow," she commented softly, smiling that small smile of hers that always did things to him.

"Glad to know I have my uses."

Xander watched in captivation as Buffy finally sat up and stretched out like a cat, the movement causing all sorts of thoughts to bombard his poor defenceless mind. Only her sly little grin, indicating she knew exactly what she was doing to him, stopped him from feeling too bad about where his mind had taken him. She was going to be the death of him he knew, and he would love every second of it.

"I'm sure I'll find out what they all are over time."

"Oh, I can guarantee it," he promised her fervently.

Moving so she was now seated next to him, he instinctively put an arm around her while she rested her head on his shoulder. It was something they had done many a time before, although purely in a platonic way, but he had never felt such a surge of electricity before, and dearly wanted to feel it again. A smile broke out on his face when he realised he could and, more importantly, would.

"So, where are we going to dinner?" she asked after a minute or two, causing Xander to shiver as her breath tickled his ear.

"Well, originally I had a table booked at a restaurant on City Walk, but I rang them when I went to get us a snack from Dr. Sloan's place and given what had happened at Universal Studios they'd cancelled all reservations, so I thought we could go somewhere a little less formal."

"Where?"

"Before I tell you, do you like ribs?" he asked, a touch nervous.

* * *

**BBQ Bob's  
Los Angeles  
Saturday 13th November 1999,  
20:30.**

Buffy loved eating ribs.

Buffy especially loved eating barbecue ribs.

On the whole she wasn't a big meat eater; she'd had the occasional hamburger after a patrol and enjoyed the occasional roast dinner courtesy of her mom, but otherwise she was more of a chicken and fish kinda gal. When it came to ribs, however, Carnivore Buffy came out to play.

The only problem was there's no way you could truly enjoy eating ribs and remain clean and dignified, which was one of the reasons why she rarely indulged.

She'd never eaten them away from home, and even then she'd always felt a little self-conscious of how she looked afterwards. Her mom didn't like them and, while she tried her best, she couldn't help but look at her daughter strangely whenever she ate them, so Buffy hadn't requested or ordered them often.

Willow was a pretty dainty eater, who sometimes looked like she wanted to be wrapped in plastic when eating spaghetti, which meant that ribs were completely off the menu in her presence.

In fact Xander was the only person she could be around when she ate that didn't make her feel self-conscious, at least not in a bad way, and knew that he wouldn't look at her strangely if she made a pig of herself, stones and glasshouses came to mind in that respect.

Another factor why she'd resisted the urge to indulge, at least before she was Called, was that she turned into a walking stomach when eating ribs and it took her a long time to burn it off. Her metabolism was much faster now she was a Slayer, but she was still conscious of what she ate and she had started to realise that maybe she was a little too conscious.

She had enjoyed the looks Xander had given her earlier today when she'd modelled the different swimsuits, not only because it was always good for a woman's ego to be looked at the way he did, but also because she could see more than simple desire in his eyes, which had ignited a warmth within her that she hadn't felt for some time. The problem came when she had looked at herself in the mirror and was able to see her ribs clearly defined through her skin, something that she hadn't noticed before. It wasn't to an extreme extent, but it did hit home that she wasn't really eating enough.

She knew the chances of gaining too much weight was pretty much impossible given everything that she did, so she had decided there and then to stop denying herself food when she was hungry and allow herself to indulge more. She'd decided to start her new outlook on food when, once they'd arrived at Xander's cousin's restaurant and noticed that they did an all you can eat special, he had challenged her to an informal rib-eating contest, a challenge she had quickly accepted.

Xander she knew had at least one hollow leg by the way she'd seen him eat in the past, but a day of exercise had increased that to unforeseen proportions, which he proved by setting a pretty amazing pace in the early stages. She was certain that, if she hadn't been matching him rib for rib, the clientele that had been avidly watching their unofficial contest would have been in awe of him.

Her competitive nature, coupled with her love of ribs and a preternaturally enhanced metabolism, had come to the fore at about the same time Xander had begun to lag. She hadn't wanted to show him up, but she had simply been enjoying herself too much to stop. By the smile on Xander's face, it looked he hadn't minded too much. By the time she'd finally had her fill she felt like she would have to be rolled out of the restaurant, but it was definitely worth it.

Once they'd finally had their fill, no doubt to the relief of the chef, they had gone to their respective washrooms to clean up, a sure sign of a meal well enjoyed, and after relaxing for a while at the counter and talking to Jesse's business partner Steve, were now dancing slowly to the sounds of the house jazz bad.

She'd danced with Xander before and, not including that moment of madness where she'd basically used him like a human pole to get on Angel's nerves, he had always seemed to be a little uncomfortable with it. She hadn't danced with him since his road trip, and it seemed that his time away had certainly helped him with not only his confidence, but with his dancing skills as well. Of course, considering the work he'd supposedly done while in Oxnard that wasn't so surprising.

She still didn't know whether she believed him or not about the whole stripping thing; despite the very pleasing visuals that it produced when she thought about it, she couldn't realistically see Xander doing something like that. His refusal to divulge any more concerning that particular experience, going so far as giving his word that he would never tell the story, meant that she had no real way of proving his story one way or another. As long as he kept dancing the way he was right now, however, she didn't really care.

The song, and the set, eventually came to an end, the band receiving an enthusiastic round of applause as they took their break, so Buffy and Xander went back to the counter.

"Drink?" Xander asked.

"Please," she replied, "a coke."

"Diet?"

"I doubt there's much point considering the herd of cows I've left ribless tonight," she pointed out.

"Well I've never thought you've had to watch your figure, especially as there were so many men around who were willing to do it for you," he added with a mock leer, "but I thought you once said that you preferred the taste of diet."

"I did," she agreed, "but I tell myself I prefer the taste as an extra excuse to drink it."

"Ah, now that I can believe." Xander turned to Steve, who was helping out behind the counter. "Two cokes please."

"Sure, although I'm surprised either one of you can fit anything else in considering," he commented, referring to their gargantuan feat earlier.

"Well I can't speak for Buffy, but I had my stomach replaced with a TARDIS when I was seven for just such an occasion as tonight."

"A TARDIS?" Steve asked, bewildered.

"Did you ever watch the British TV show Doctor Who?"

"The show with the police box?" he said, vaguely recollecting the show in question.

"That's the one. The police box was called a TARDIS, which if you remember was bigger on the inside than on the outside."

"I was always a Battlestar Galactica man myself," Steve said with a small smile.

"To each their own I suppose."

Their conversation was cut short as four men wearing balaclavas and packing shotguns stormed through the front door, the one in front firing once into the air.

"EVERYBODY FREEZE! THIS IS A STICK UP!"

"You know," Xander said to Buffy as they followed the gunman's order, begrudgingly in Buffy's case, "I'm annoyed that this didn't happen last night."

"Why's that?"

"Because that way I could have blamed the Hellmouth and not my own bad luck."


	13. Chapter 13

**Angel Investigations,  
Los Angeles, CA.,  
Saturday 13th November 1999,  
23:40.**

If anyone had told Xander that tonight would have ended with him sitting uncomfortably across the room from his ex-girlfriend, he'd have laughed in their face. He definitely wasn't laughing at the moment.

He'd known that Cordelia had moved to LA to pursue her acting career, as he'd talked to her just before she left Sunnydale wanting to clear the air completely between them before they parted ways for good. He had figured, however, that the City of Angels was so large that the chances of meeting up with her during the time he and Buffy were there to be pretty small.

What he hadn't figured on was her joining up with Deadboy to fight the good fight, which brought on this unexpected turn of events.

The gunmen that had decided to grace his cousin's bar with their presence had been surprised to find that the other owner was a police Detective Lieutenant and their robbery had quickly turned into a hostage situation.

While Steve dipped into his hostage negotiation skills to try and bring a peaceful end to the situation, Xander spent most of his time trying to prevent Buffy from attempting something, well, stupid was the only word he could use to describe it.

He knew that, if their captors were unarmed, Buffy would have had no trouble in wiping the floor with them. Hell, even he would have had a better than average chance given all he'd been through the last few years, but he also knew that neither he nor Buffy could dodge bullets, and he'd had no intention of seeing himself proven right.

For over two hours he had managed to keep Buffy calm enough not to let her Slayer side rule her head, although he would never voice it in such a way out loud, but he had always known that he'd been fighting a losing battle and she herself had confirmed it when she'd suddenly shot up and went charging at them.

She'd managed to get to the first gunman before they'd even had time to react and had easily knocked him unconscious, and had managed in the same motion to disarm a second with a well-placed kick that had sent their weapon flying across the restaurant. By then the remaining gunmen had snapped out of their shock and Xander could do nothing but watch helplessly as they trained their weapons on her preparing to fire.

A sudden crash had distracted all three of them, and Xander was surprised to see Deadboy diving through the front window, landing in-between Buffy and the gunmen. The gunmen opened fire and Angel used his body to shield her from the bullets that were suddenly coming their way. The vampire with a soul had then morphed into his 'game face' and had used their surprise and fear to his advantage, quickly putting them both out of commission. Under different circumstances he might have been a little disconcerted to see the smile on Angel's face as he'd rendered the gunmen unconscious, but given what they'd tried to do, all he'd felt was upset because he couldn't get a few hits in himself.

Steve had been quick to recover from the shock of Angel's sudden arrival, and had ensured the quartet were securely bound before he called his Captain and arranged for them to be taken away. His job as a cop then mixed with his role as restaurant owner and had offered a round of drinks on the house to his frazzled customers, ensuring that they didn't moan too much while they waited for their statements to be taken.

He'd decided to take Xander, Buffy and Angel's statements himself, which allowed them to leave before the other cops arrived, as he'd known that the less questions they had to answer, the less lies they'd have to tell. Xander had been surprised that Steve hadn't been all that fazed by Angel's vampiric visage, only to be told that this wasn't the first time he'd dealt with the real nightlife of LA.

The three of them had quickly left the restaurant afterwards, not wanting to look a gift horse in the mouth, and as Angel drove them back to his base of operations, the Champion for the Powers That Be explained how he'd turned up in time. It turned out that a friend of his, a half Brachen by the name of Doyle, had received a vision from The PTB of Buffy dying in a hail of gunfire, with Xander following soon after as he'd run to her aid.

Xander had found thanking Angel for saving his life simply impossible, as too much bile rose up whenever he'd tried, but he did manage to thank him for saving Buffy's life without swallowing his own tongue in the process, so he didn't worry too much about it.

Upon arriving at the souled vampire's office/apartment, the demon in question had requested some time alone with Buffy to 'talk'. She had agreed, not that Xander had expected any less, but he had enjoyed seeing the look that crossed Angel's face when she'd looked to him before doing so. He doubted she would have said no had he objected, but Xander had been surprised when he hadn't felt any jealousy concerning them being alone together and had actually nodded in acquiescence. He quickly realised that because he trusted Buffy implicitly, he knew that nothing would happen. He also knew that he most probably passed some sort of test and thanked his frequent stays at the hospital where he'd read countless woman's magazines for that.

One thing that had annoyed and dismayed him was the realisation that he'd found himself unable throw his and Buffy's relationship in Angel's face, not only because he really, really, wanted to, but also because it gave him further proof that he was indeed turning into a responsible adult. Of course the appreciative look Buffy had thrown him before disappearing had made it worthwhile, but he still felt saddened.

It was only a minute after they had disappeared downstairs that Cordelia had breezed into the office, followed by a man that seemed to have inherited his old fashion sense and could finally see what everyone had told him over the years; the man looked like he'd just waded through a vat of hellhound vomit. The man in question, who Xander discovered was Doyle, had quickly seen the looks the former couple had been sending each other and had only stayed long enough to receive Xander's gratitude before he'd decided that discretion was the better part of valour and made a hasty exit.

Xander could tell that Doyle had the hots for Cordelia by the way he looked at her, but ensured he didn't make any mention of it. He did know, however, that Doyle would need to inform her of his demonic heritage if he'd any chance with the former cheerleader. Doyle would need to do it at some point at any rate in Xander's opinion, but definitely before he seriously pursued her, as while he might not have the best chance if Cordelia did know, it would be nothing compared to what would happen if they she found out after the fact.

Doyle's departure was ten minutes ago and neither he nor Cordelia had uttered a word; something that Xander thought could actually be registered in the Guinness Book of World Records. Finally, he decided that he would get the ball rolling.

"So, how's tricks?" he asked.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Cordelia instantly replied, her hackles rising.

Xander quickly realised how she had taken his question and instead of trying to defend what he'd said, something he knew he'd fail to do given who he was talking to, he suppressed the urge to roll his eyes and tried again.

"How are you?"

"Fine," she stated curtly, seemingly finding it difficult to speak civilly to him. "So," she continued after a beat or two, "what sort of spell did you put Buffy under to get her to go out with you?" she asked bitingly.

"What?" he blurted out shocked beyond belief about what he'd just heard.

"Come on! You can't really expect me to believe she's going out with you willingly do you? She wouldn't have looked at you if you were the last man on earth, so you must have done something to force her."

Xander couldn't believe what he was hearing, and yet found himself unable to speak. He had thought that he and Cordelia had at least cleared the air between them before she'd left Sunnydale, but it seemed like distance had only allowed her anger to grow.

The one thing he didn't want to do was let his anger get the best of him, something that Cordelia had always made him do in the past, as that would pretty much guarantee things would deteriorate fast. Her voice had already risen to a level that he was sure Buffy could hear if she tried to do so, and he didn't want to know what she would do if she caught any more of his ex-girlfriend's diatribe.

Moving faster than Cordelia thought him able, he had covered the distance between them in a half a heartbeat and leaned in so close that he only had to whisper for her to hear him. "I don't know what's wrong with you, and quite frankly I don't care, but if you keep talking like that I promise you I will not be held accountable for my actions, clear?"

Moving back a step or two, Xander could see that his words and tone had gotten through whatever defences Cordelia had erected, as he face was pale and her eyes wide.

"I-I'm sorry." She looked at him; he believed that her gaze was sincere, but he didn't allow it to affect him. "I'm sorry. When Doyle told me about the vision, I freaked. I thought you'd try and flaunt the fact that Buffy had finally shown interest in you and decided to go straight on the offensive."

"Why?" he asked, the anger he had been feeling making way for hurt. "I really thought we'd… well not become friends, but at least decided not to be enemies. Anyway, why would you think I'd do something like that?"

"I don't know. I mean, I moved out here to become an actress and besides one TV commercial and a casting couch incident where the director ended up singing soprano, I've got nowhere fast. Hearing that you finally got the girl of your dreams…"

"What's all this 'finally' stuff? Yes, I'm over the moon that Buffy wants to go out with me, but I hadn't been pining for her since the first day I met her like you're suggesting. I'd stopped seeing her as anything other that a friend around the time she decided to use me as a human pole that night at the Bronze, and that didn't change until after I came back from my road trip."

He had very purposely said nothing about their relationship, knowing that whenever he had in the past, she would immediately comment on his indiscretion with Willow, including when they had tentatively cleared the air. He figured that it had become so ingrained into her personality now that she did it instinctively, and saw no need to trigger another episode.

Cordelia stared at him intently for several long moments before she sighed and dropped her head slightly. "Yeah, I know. Anyway, I… guess what I want to say is… look, I'm sorry alright."

Xander knew better than to comment on just how hard she found apologising, especially as she'd done so three times in such a short period of time, and instead had simply nodded once. "Apology accepted. Now, while Buff and Deadboy chat, tell me how life in the big city is going."

Always happy to talk about her life, Cordelia soon began to speak animatedly about her life in LA, Xander doing his best to remain interested.

* * *

"So, Xander huh?"

Buffy and Angel were standing at opposite ends of his apartment, neither one knowing quite how to start the conversation, at least until now.

Buffy had never felt so uncomfortable around her former boyfriend before, and had been surprised that she hadn't felt the same little tingle that she normally would, which made her feel guilty a moment later when she realised that she shouldn't have expected to, especially not while out on a date with Xander.

When Angel had asked to speak to her, she couldn't help but look to Xander to see his reaction and, while she could tell that he was less than thrilled with the prospect of her spending time alone with her former boyfriend, he hadn't argued for which she was certainly pleased about. She was also proud that Xander had kept his tongue once Angel had realised that they were actually out on a date, knowing that had it occurred before his road trip he would not have been able to resist rubbing it in.

She repeated Angel's words in her head, along with the tone, and realised that she would need to nip whatever it was he was about to say in the bud, as she would not have him ruin what had, despite the hold up at the restaurant, been one of the most enjoyable days she had experienced in a long, long time. She might not want to hurt Angel's feelings, but he did need to understand where they stood with each other.

"Yes, Angel, Xander. He and I are dating, well this is actually our first date, but whatever the case we are together."

"Why him?" he suddenly demanded, pacing back and forth like a caged animal. "Why out of every man on the planet did you have to choose him of all people?"

"Frankly it's none of your damn business who I see or why," she snapped, quickly losing her patience. "You have your life, and I have mine. Anyway, why not him?" she asked, her eyes and tone challenging.

Angel didn't know quite how to answer that question, at least not without exposing one of his biggest fears to her. He had known that after his departure she would not stay single forever and had come to accept it. He would not want to begrudge her any happiness, with the life she led there would be so little, but until tonight he had never been worried about losing her. He had believed that there was no one who could challenge his position in her heart, and therefore had not worried about it, figuring that when he finally did find a cure for his vampirism he would be able to re-enter her life and pick up where they left off.

Angel of course had known how Xander felt about Buffy, but had never considered that her feelings for the boy would change from the platonic/brotherly feelings she had always shown for him, and therefore had not considered him a threat. By the look on her face he had been wrong.

The problem was that he knew Xander would take care of her; possibly better than he could himself. He had proven it to him numerous times during his time in Sunnydale, the notable example being when the boy had actually forced him into leading him through the underground network of tunnels to the Master's lair, all in the hope of helping Buffy.

It had been that incident that had gotten through to Angel that if he didn't take a more active role in Buffy's life he would lose her, most probably to Xander or at least someone like him.

If their relationship was serious, and despite the fact this was their first date he had a feeling it was, then the hope that he'd one day find a way for them to be together was dashed. He wasn't prepared to admit that right now, nor even consider it.

"What about us?" he asked, desperate to find a way to prevent what he saw happening before him.

Buffy went to say 'What us?' but stopped herself. What about her and Angel? Hadn't she thought not that long ago that he was her soulmate, that there was no one who could possibly make her feel as happy as he did? What had changed?

That last question was easy; she had.

It had been months since they had been together, and if she were honest with herself they were barely together last year at all, even when they were. No, the last time they had truly been a couple was the night they had made love; the same night he had lost his soul.

She had done a lot of soul searching, pardon the pun, during the summer, and had realised that she and Angel hadn't actually been together all that long. They had only dated casually those first few months, and Angel hadn't really tried to be anything more than someone who would swoop in and give her cryptic clues or save her from the occasional vampire or demon.

It had been enough for her at the time; the tall, dark and handsome stranger held a majesty that had captured her inexperienced heart, and she had accepted whatever time he gave her. Their relationship only really turned serious after she returned from her father's place in LA, and even then they'd only had two proper dates, and a Tarakan assassin had interrupted one of those.

That wasn't to say that her feelings for him hadn't been real, but hindsight had allowed her to see that she may have made more of them than was actually there. After Angel had returned from wherever he'd been sent to when he'd gone through Acathla's portal, she had tried to rekindle their relationship but it never really worked, despite what she might have shown otherwise. She'd been so resolute that if things between them went back to the way they were that everything else in her life would do likewise, she had ignored the doubts in her mind concerning whether it was actually something she wanted.

When he'd left, she had mourned the loss of their relationship, but again possibly more than she'd had any right to do. There had been as much pain as there had been happiness, perhaps even more of the former than the latter, and she had come to the conclusion that there would never be a way to get past their history to have a future.

It was at that point she had decided to rejoin the dating world with Parker, and that had turned out to be just as successful as her last relationship, except far shorter.

And then came Xander.

With Xander she had someone she knew she could trust, someone who would support her and challenge her, someone who wouldn't follow her blindly and would actually take her to task when he felt she was in the wrong. With him she actually felt she had a true partner, where there would be as much give as there would be take. She also knew Xander would be a part of both sides of her life, Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Buffy the College Student. The fact all of that were true even before he'd asked her out only made their relationship more special.

With Angel, he had almost always set the pace of their relationship, making choices for the both of them instead of discussing the choices with her. Even the end of their relationship had been his decision, time and again telling her that their being together was wrong and yet always seeming to be around.

Another factor was that they'd never really been friends. They didn't really have much in common beyond their fight against the darkness was blindingly clear when she'd thought about it, and had actually found his dark and sometimes depressing mood annoying at times. Because of that she didn't really know what to say to him now that they weren't together, which no doubt contributed to her feeling of unease when they had come downstairs.

Realising that she had been silent for a while, and that Angel was starting to get agitated beyond the norm, she finally responded. "Angel, there is no us. There hasn't been for months. You left saying that it was for the best, and while I didn't agree at the time, I do now. We could never be what the other person wanted; there are simply too many obstacles and too much history between us now for it to ever work. I'm sorry if that isn't what you wanted to hear, but it's the truth."

"And you think that Xander can be what you want?"

"He already is."

The matter-of-fact way she said it, coupled with the underlying certainty in her voice, made Angel realise there was nothing he could say or do to change her mind. He wasn't even sure that he wanted her to, given that she'd just reminded him why he'd left in the first place. He couldn't be what she wanted or needed, and if he ever found a way that he could, he would most probably be too late anyway.

"I guess there isn't much else for us to talk about then."

Angel took one last look at Buffy before walking to the stairs.

"Angel." He stopped and then turned round to face her, although he didn't rush to do so. "I hope you find what you're looking for."

He tried to smile, but at the moment he just didn't have the energy. "I already did, but it looks like I just lost it." He then turned and resumed his trek upstairs, Buffy sighed and followed a few seconds later.

* * *

Luckily for Xander, he only had to concentrate for a few minutes when Angel emerged from the stairwell, looking in his opinion even broodier than normal. Buffy followed him a few seconds later, also looking less than happy, but once she caught sight of him her radiant smile came back full force.

"Everything alright?" he asked as she came up to him.

Buffy nodded and wrapped her arms around his wais, resting her head against his chest. "Yeah, everything's fine. I'm feeling a little tired, do you think we could get back to the hotel?"

"Sure, I called Gerry and he said he'd be here any time now."

Buffy turned her head and saw that Cordelia was looking at the two of them. "Hey Cordelia, how's tricks?"

The growl suddenly emanating from the former cheerleader's direction told Xander that they'd definitely outstayed their welcome, and he gently lead Buffy outside to wait for Gerry.


	14. Chapter 14

_**Chapter Fourteen**_

**The Beverly Hilton,  
Los Angeles, California,  
Sunday 14th November 1999,  
11:15.**

"So, Mr. Harris, what do you have planned for us today?" Buffy asked as they made their way back to their suite from the restaurant, having had a late breakfast.

"Well, Ms. Summers," Xander replied, "just like the rest of this weekend, it's a surprise."

After their little adventure last night, not to mention the talks they'd had with their respective ex's, the pair had done nothing more than get back to the hotel and crash out on the bed. Unfortunately, unlike the morning before, they hadn't been spared the, whilst not uncomfortable, awkward position of waking up in each others arms, with one of Buffy's legs draped over Xander's and pressing against his crotch.

Both knew that whilst it would be so easy to give in to the new sensations they were feeling towards one another, they wanted to take things relatively slow, making every effort to ensure that, when they did finally take that step, there would be no doubts about what they were doing.

Those thoughts hadn't helped Xander's 'predicament', having realised that one particular part of his anatomy had made it's presence known, nor did the wide eyed stare Buffy had given him when had also become aware. He strangely hadn't found himself embarrassed as he thought he would, but that had a lot to do with the fact that Buffy hadn't shown any either, and had simply turned over in bed and stated he could use the bathroom first, an offer he had quickly accepted and utilised.

It being a Sunday, Xander forewent his morning exercises, knowing that he would be doing something similar later on that day, and instead they had taken their time to get themselves ready and get everything packed before going down to breakfast.

"After last night, I'm not sure I could handle any more surprises, Xander," she told him with a smile, letting him know that she was only teasing.

In actual fact Buffy was quite looking forward to whatever Xander had planned, as despite a couple of snags yesterday, she'd had a whale of a time, more fun than she could remember when she thought about it.

"Oh, I know you're going to love this one Buff," he replied, "I can almost guarantee it."

"So, can you at least give me a clue?" she asked hopefully, adding a little pout to help persuade him.

"Well," he drawled, "I can let you know that we're going to a place just outside of LA, but I do need to get something from you."

"What's that?" she asked, intrigued.

"Your solemn vow that you will never tell anyone what you will see today," he told her seriously.

"You want me to promise not to tell anyone that I've seen something, before I've even seen it?"

"Absolutely," he replied instantly, "because I know getting you to promise afterwards will be impossible. Now if you can't do this for me, I'll just cancel what we were going to do and go with Plan B."

Buffy looked at the completely serious look Xander was sending her way, and for a moment didn't know what to do. She could easily tell how big a deal this was for him, and the fact that he wanted to show her whatever it was and no one else did make her feel extraordinarily special, but she knew that to promise not to tell anyone included Willow and her mother, who she knew would both be like a dog with a bone in getting all the 'juicy details'.

This was a big thing he was asking of her, but seeing the earnest look on his face, she just knew that it would be worth it. "I give you my word that I will never tell a soul," she vowed.

Xander released the breath he hadn't even known he was holding. He knew that he was being a little overboard with the whole vow thing, but he knew that if this ever got out Willow and the others would never let it go and would rib him about it until the day he died. Again, he was probably exaggerating things a little, but this meant a lot to him and he was glad that Buffy had agreed.

Showing his gratitude, he quickly pulled Buffy into a hug and spun her around gently, mindful that they had just eaten. "You are a goddess among women, and I do not know what I've done to deserve you."

"That's easy to explain," she told him softly, "you're you."

* * *

**Fabulous Ladies Nightclub,  
Oxnard, California,  
Sunday 14th November 1999,  
14:45.**

Denise Wren, owner/manager of the Fabulous Ladies Nightclub, watched as a**very** familiar face walked in, an attractive blonde on his arm, a bag in his hand and a smile on his face. Even though she had known he was coming for a few days, it was still a surprise to see him again, although most definitely a welcome one. Neither one had seen her yet, as there weren't many lights were on in the club, so she made her way closer so she could hear what they were saying.

"Xander," the blonde began, "don't take this the wrong way, but why in the**hell** have you brought me to a strip club on our first date. Sure, it's a male strip club, but still…"

"You don't remember, do you?" he asked, disappointed and hurt that she had forgotten what he told her. Those feelings disappeared however when he saw the realisation dawning on her face.

"You mean this is the place where you…"

"No power on this earth Buffy," Xander said cutting in, "I told you that."

She looked at him incredulously. "You've brought me to the place where you spent the summer stripping, and you still won't **tell** me about it?"

"I made a promise to myself that I would never tell anyone and I keep my promises. I'm sorry Buff, but that's just the way it is."

"So why…"

"Well," he began smiling slightly, "I figured that if I can't **tell** you…"

Buffy's eyes get a gleam to them and a wide smile appeared on her face as she realised what he was getting at. "You're gonna show me?"

"If that's alright with you?" he asked with a smirk.

"Oh yeah," she agreed heartily, "that's **more** than alright with me. I gotta admit, since that night you told me a little about what you did here, I've had more than one dream that filled in the blanks that you wouldn't."

"Oh you have, have you? You're a very naughty girl, Miss summers," Xander chastised her, although the smile on his face ruined it.

"You haven't begun to see how naughty I can be, but I promise that you will," she replied huskily, enjoying the fact Xander had to swallow suddenly. "One thing though," she went on, having decided she'd toyed with him enough, at least for the moment, "do they have an 'open mic' kinda deal here? I can't see them just letting you get on stage and shaking your tail feather just like that."

Denise decided that this was the best time to make herself known. "There's always a spot open for Al here, whenever he wants it."

Buffy had known the woman had been there since the moment they came through the door, but as there was nothing causing her Slayer-Sense to tingle she had said nothing about it. She saw Xander smile as he recognised the voice of the woman and watched as he span round and pulled the woman into a hug.

"Denny!" he exclaimed happily. "It's great to see you!"

"You too baby doll." Denise saw the jealous look that Buffy was currently sending her way, mixed in with the generic 'hands off my man, bitch' glare that all women have sent and received countless times in their life. "Sorry hon," she said to Buffy as she released Xander, "Al here quickly became a favourite among our clientèle. What he lacked in skill he more than made up for with enthusiasm."

Xander flushed slightly at Denise's choice of words, knowing it was in no way unintentional. During his time working there, he had gotten somewhat of a reputation as a ladies man. It was completely undeserved, as while he had received more than one invitation to a ladies bedroom after a show, he had never accepted any of them.

Ever since his 'encounter' with Faith, and the subsequent fallout, the idea of a one-night stand had held no appeal to him, even though some of the women that had offered appealed to him a great deal. A couple had actually seen his refusal as a challenge, and while there had been moments when Xander had been close to giving in, he never did.

The biggest problem was that he had never been a 'kiss and tell' kinda guy, having never liked the jocks at school who had bragged about getting laid like it was a competition, so whenever one of the other strippers asked if he'd taken them up on their offer, he had always kept tight-lipped, something the others had taken as an admission, and the rest, as they say, is history.

"Buffy, I'd like you to meet Denise Wren, the owner if this fine establishment and the best dancer this side of the Mississippi. Denny, I'd like you tom meet Buffy Summers, my… girlfriend?"

"You don't sound too sure there Al," Denise teased.

He wasn't really; he'd been thinking of Buffy as his girlfriend from the moment she had agreed to go out on a date with him, but one date that wasn't even over yet didn't exactly equate to girlfriend/boyfriend status. He knew what he wanted, but until Buffy said what she wanted he didn't really know where he stood. He never really knew where he stood with Buffy; he could read her pretty well about anything else, but when it came to him it was as though he had a blind spot, so he didn't want to assume anything or make her feel pressurised.

"It's actually our first date," Buffy told her, "but Xander's right with the girlfriend thing though," Buffy said to the older woman, but looked directly at Xander when she said it.

Denise noticed the way Xander's face lit up at Buffy's confirmation and knew straight away that she was very special to him. While she along with everyone else had ribbed him mercilessly over his supposed womanising, she knew that he hadn't taken any of the women up on their offer.

In her opinion it was rare for any man to turn down sex when it's offered to them on a silver platter, and almost inconceivable from someone of his young age. Of course, now that she'd seen Buffy, it made more sense to her; why go out for hamburger when you've got steak at home?

"It's nice to meet you Buffy," Denise greeted, "any friend of Al's is a friend of mine. So, you're here to see what he can do, huh?"

"It seems that way; I had no idea where we were coming until we got here."

"Well, we've got a VIP booth free, or would you rather reserve a place at the table?" she asked.

"Uh, 'table'?" Buffy asked in reply.

"It's what we call the seating area around the stage," Denise explained. "You'll get a better view there, but the booth gives you a little more privacy."

"I think I'll sit at the table," Buffy told her, "I always want to be where the action is."

"Oh I like her Al," she told Xander with an approving smile, "she's definitely a keeper."

"I've known that for a long time Denny," Xander affirmed. "Is it alright if Buffy comes in with me quickly to meet the guys?" he asked. "I know that now's probably the best time without her getting a free viewing as it were."

"Sure, if you think she can handle it."

"Denise I can handle anything," Buffy answered before Xander had a chance, "don't worry about that."

"Oh yes, **definitely** a keeper."

* * *

"Yo, Al," one of the strippers, Trent, called out in pleasant surprise as Xander and Buffy appeared backstage, "long time no see. How's 'tricks'?"

"Good to see you too, Trent," Xander replied warmly as he gripped the other man's hand. "I'm not in the business anymore though, instead I work construction."

"Yeah, I can see you put on some muscle since I last saw you," he commented as he gave Xander a professional once over. "So what are you doing here, especially with such a pretty lady with you?"

"Well I thought I'd make this weekend special for my girlfriend Buffy here," Xander said, giving Buffy a quick squeeze, "and make a one time only return gig."

Trent's eyebrows almost hit his hairline when he heard that. He remembered when Xander first got roped into dancing when Denny was a man down, and how they all thought he would give himself a stroke going as red as he had gotten in embarrassment as he did his first routine.

Denny had kept him on as a stripper after that, as even though it had been an amateurish performance at best, both she and the other guys could see he had tremendous potential, not to mention that he had been well received by the clientèle.

They had all gotten on with Xander from the moment he'd first set foot in the door of the club the day his car had blown up, and could all see that what he needed, beyond anything else, was a serious ego boost, and that was what they intended to give him.

Getting Xander to train with the other strippers to improve his skills, not to mention his physique and fashion sense, and getting the attention of the ladies that frequented the club, had helped to bring Xander out of shell a great deal during his time there.

Despite his success on stage, they could all tell that Xander would never be comfortable enough to do this as a job full time, so for him to volunteer to go out there just to impress this girl showed just how much he thought of her. Trent took a look at Xander's lady friend, Buffy if he heard correctly, and wondered if she knew just what she had in Xander, and decided to find out.

Then something Denny had told the guys a couple of days finally clicked into his mind. "So **you're** the 'star attraction' Denny talked about a couple of days ago huh?"

"What?" Xander said nervously, knowing now that Denny had something up her sleeve.

Trent saw the look and smiled. "Yeah, she told us that someone special was coming in tonight, and then broadcast it to the audience."

"Oh my god, I'm gonna kill her," Xander moaned as he realised what that meant, Trent's smile widening as he realised Xander had no idea.

Buffy watched the byplay between the two and wondered what was going on. "What's wrong Xander?" she asked him.

"I picked doing this on a Sunday as it's generally the quietest night of the week, what with it being the Lord's day and all, but Denny is known as a great judge of character, so if she's told everyone that someone special is going to be on stage tonight…"

"This place is going to be packed wall to wall with women," Trent finished.

Buffy wasn't sure what to say to that; part of her found it funny that Xander would have to do his routine in front of so may people, but the thought of that many women ogling her Xander like a piece of meat brought the green eyed monster into play. "You know that if you don't want to do this you don't have to," she told him eventually, her concern for him overpowering everything else.

Xander shook his head. "No, I said I'd do this and I will, it's just that I never got used to having that many people watching me like… that, and it makes me nervous."

"You're gonna do fine," Trent assured him, making a mental note for him and the others to go through Xander's routine with him later just to be on the safe side. "Now go on and say hi to the others while I grill the missus here," he said as he gave Xander a gentle push towards the guys.

As Xander followed Trent's request and went and caught up with everyone, Buffy turned her attention to him. "So, what was it you wanted to say without him hearing?" she asked immediately, recognising his ploy for what it was.

"Nothing bad I assure you," Trent told her, wondering why the hairs at the back of his neck suddenly went up. "I just wanted to check and see if you knew just how much Xander cares for you."

"What the hell do you know about it?" she asked, feeling a little put out that someone she barely knew would speak to her like that.

"I do this job because I love it," Trent began, ignoring Buffy's tone, "I love the attention, and I **really** love the money. Xander is different; initially he did it as a favour for a friend, and then because he realised it was his best chance of making enough money to buy a new car and get home before he hit thirty. He got better at it, and could have made a decent living had he continued, but he never really enjoyed it enough to make a career out of it."

"What's your point?" Buffy asked, wondering where Trent was going with this.

"When he left to go home," he continued, as though he hadn't heard her, "we all figured he'd never set foot on stage again unless he had to, mainly because he'd always felt so self-conscious when he was out on stage, but here he is getting ready to go out there again, not because he has to, but because he wants to do something special for**you**. I just wanted to be sure you knew that."

Looking at her for a moment to check that his message had gotten across, Trent then walked over to Xander and the others, leaving Buffy to her thoughts.

Buffy hadn't really had time to process what was going to happen today, but Buffy did know how big a deal this was to Xander. When he had made a passing reference to stripping after his return to Sunnydale, he had been quick to dismiss the topic, and she had abided by his wishes as she could tell he really didn't want to talk about it. It was the same reason she hadn't mentioned it to the others, knowing that Xander would be uncomfortable with the questions that would inevitably follow, not to mention the teasing, not matter how good natured it would have been.

She knew from the way he had reacted to seeing Denise and Trent again that Xander didn't regret his time here, or that he thought it a bad experience, so she wasn't worried about that. What she **was** worried about, thanks in part to Trent's little talk with her, was what going out there again would be like for him. She should have realised how uncomfortable he must have felt being ogled by a room full of women after the way he had reacted during his time on the swim team, not to mention the way she and the others had reacted to him.

For Xander to do this for her did indeed show her how much he cared, but she started to get concerned that he might be putting himself through this because he felt he still needed to impress her, and she had to speak with him to make sure he knew that she was more than happy with the way he was, and that she didn't want him any other way. She wouldn't have said yes to this date if she did.

She wouldn't, however, do that in front of his friends, knowing that it would embarrass him, so instead she walked up and threaded her arm through his and got to know the people he became friends with during his time in Oxnard.

* * *

"Off! Off! Off! Off! Off! Off! Off! Off! Off! Off!"

Buffy could barely hear herself speak over the noise of a room full of women all chanting for the current stripper to remove the final piece of cloth that kept his decency, although she wasn't sure he'd had any decency to begin with.

If the circumstances were different, Buffy knew without a shadow of a doubt that her face would be glowing red with embarrassment at the situation she was in; she wasn't a prude, but she'd never been as extrovert as to go to a strip joint She doubted that she would again, but tonight was a special occasion, an experience to be savoured.

The stripper strutting his stuff at the moment, Lucas, had not ingratiated himself to her at all earlier today, as he'd been less than subtle in his appraisal of her when they'd met backstage, not to mention vocal, to the point where Xander had needed to intervene, if only to ensure that the guy kept his spleen.

It hadn't seemed to matter to Lucas that she was with Xander, and he had even tried to insinuate that Xander and he had 'shared' women in the past, which had been what had driven Xander to get involved. She knew that Xander would **never** do that, as he treated women with too much respect to pass them around like party favours, and some of the others guys that had suddenly tried to distance themselves from him when they'd heard his comment knew it too.

Xander had taken her to one side and had immediately professed his innocence, Buffy waving his concerns away with a smile and a hug to show she knew him better than that. She had then used it as the perfect opportunity to assure herself that Xander knew he didn't have to prove anything to her, or anyone else, by going out on stage tonight.

Later on, she and Denise, or Denny as she'd asked Buffy to call her, had talked for a while as she did a final check around the club, where she'd gone on to explain Xander's unwarranted reputation as a ladies man, and the reasons behind it, probably wanting to ensure that she got the full story and that she wouldn't think badly about him. Buffy had thanked Denny for her concern, but explained that she had known Xander for years now and that there was little to nothing she could be told that would change her opinion of him.

Buffy had found herself liking Denny immensely, especially when she'd discovered that it wasn't only Paris that Xander had saved from vampires during his time there, meaning she didn't have to be so cagey when talking about herself.

She hadn't seen Xander since leaving him backstage, as Trent and a few of the other performers helped him prepare for his routine, so she had been left to her own devices so to speak, and had gone on a little stroll to check out the local neighbourhood. It was a nice town, reminding Buffy a lot of Sunnydale in fact, although without that pesky mouth of hell feeling she had gotten used to. She had even popped into a local gift shop and purchased a few trinkets for Willow and the others, adding to the items they had gotten in LA at the beach, before she finally headed back to the club to ensure her a prime seat at the table.

It was a good thing she had come back when she did, as less than twenty minutes later the club was standing room only, and Buffy's heart went out to Xander knowing how he was going to react to so many people being there for his show. She was still of two minds over the whole thing herself; there was a part of her that wanted to see Xander in all his glory, but it was warring with the part of her that wanted to gauge the eyes out of every woman in the place, with the former just edging out over the latter.

Denny had assured both her and Xander that it was at the stripper's discretion whether they go fully nude or not, stating that she would never force someone to expose themselves so completely when she herself would never do so, but both realised that it wasn't Denny but the crowd that would be applying the pressure.

It was a pressure that Lucas had decided to give in to at the culmination of his routine, given that his loincloth had just gone sailing over her head and had been caught by a top heavy brunette who began to wave it over her head in delight.

Buffy had no idea what Xander would do, but after taking a quick look at Lucas and then remembering the way Xander had filled out those Speedos, she knew he'd end his routine with a bigger finish than Lucas just did, no matter what his decision was.

Trent came out next, wearing an authentic look RCMP uniform, at least it looked like the one in 'Due South' that Benton wore, which told Buffy that Xander would be up next. She took a sip of her drink, and for a moment bemoaned that fact that while Denny had allowed her in, despite her club having a strict over 21's policy, she had told her not to even bother trying to order anything alcoholic.

She had to admit that Trent looked good, in that way men in movies and TV looked good but never truly matched up with reality, but she was too focussed on seeing Xander to take too much notice. When Trent finished his performance, standing to attention in more ways than one, Denny took to the stage with a microphone in hand.

"Alright ladies, let's here it again for Trent!" Denny cheered as the crowd went wild once again and Trent left the stage. "Now, it's my distinct pleasure to welcome back one of our most popular guys, for one night only. Put your hands together for the one, the only, Lavelle!."

Buffy bit back a grin at the name, knowing from Denny that when he'd first gone on stage as a favour to her, he'd had little time to think of a name, and had decided to go with his middle one. All thoughts of smiling disappeared from he mind the moment Xander came through the curtain, as did pretty much all thoughts period, apart from 'hubba, hubba.'

Xander was wearing Navy dress whites, and looked like he'd just stepped out of the film An Officer And A Gentleman. His toned physique filled out the uniform nicely, and he seemed to be exuding confidence, although Buffy was sure that she was the only one in the club who could see that he wasn't feeling anywhere near as confident as he looked. That only heightened the experience it for her, knowing that he was nervous but not letting it get to him.

She had half a mind to drag him off the stage and... her ability to think abruptly left her as the music began to play, and Xander began his routine.

Xander began to strut his stuff to Holding Out For A Hero, and Buffy found it apt that he chose that song, given that he met so many of the characteristics that Bonnie Tyler was looking for. He moved around the stage as though he owned it, and for the length of that song there wasn't a single person in the club that would have disputed it.

As the clothes came off, each item showing more and more of him to the rapt audience, Buffy's world became the walking wet dream in front of her, completely under his spell like the rest of the crowd, except she knew that he'd be coming home with her, and no one else. The noise in the club had gone from silence as he began his routine, to an almost deafening roar as the ladies all cheered and clapped when the pants were ripped off in a single smooth movement, leaving Xander in just a pair of small black briefs and his cap.

He circled the edge of the stage, allowing the highly charged audience a close up look of his body, and several of the women slipped money into his briefs, their fingers lingering a little longer than necessary against his skin. Buffy held in the growl that wanted to break free as she witnessed that, especially as Xander managed to keep out of her reach as he passed by, and finally returned to centre stage. She knew why he had veered away, as while he was playing a part for the rest of the audience, he would not have been able to maintain his cool if Buffy had done the same thing.

She'd just have to make sure she got to have her chance at a later date, something she knew Xander would not object to.

As Xander returned to centre stage, he span round once and then his gaze became fixed on Buffy, and she knew without a shadow of a doubt what he wanted to know. He was leaving it up to her whether he went all the way or not, and Buffy actually felt a little faint at the power he was giving her. At that moment, the part of her that wanted to rip the rest of the crowd limb from limb at ogling **her** boyfriend suddenly came to the fore, and although a large part of her wanted nothing less than to say yes, she found herself doing the opposite.

With the barest of movements, she shook her head in the negative, and a flash of relief appeared in Xander's eyes for a moment before it disappeared, Buffy knowing that she would be the only one to have noticed. As the song neared its end, Xander slowly made his way over to her, knelt down and placed his cap on her head, caressing her cheek with his hand before he stood back up and returned to the centre of the stage for the final time, where he performed a perfect salute just as the lights went out.

There were a few moans of protest of not getting to see everything, but the vast majority of the audience had been more than satisfied by what they'd seen, and proved it by almost raising the roof with their applause. When the lights came up again, Xander was nowhere to be seen and Denny had taken his place, a wide beaming smile on her face as she fanned herself with her hand.

"Whew!" she exclaimed a little breathless, and Buffy couldn't tell whether she was faking or not. "He can fly me anytime!"

Cheers of agreement met her comment, as did a round of "Encore! Encore!"

Buffy knew that there would be no encore, and that 'Lavelle' had performed for the final time. She was glad for that, as while she wouldn't swap this experience for anything, she knew she would have a big problem with Xander doing this on a regular basis. That wasn't to say that she wouldn't ask for a private performance every now and then, but after tonight it would be for her eyes only.

She chuckled as she realised that her mind was running away with her, as they hadn't even gotten their kiss out of the way yet, and even then they were far too early in their relationship for her fantasies to become reality.

Well, at least most of them.

* * *

Buffy left the club ten minutes after Xander's routine, knowing that he would soon be joining her. Normally the men would do 2-3 routines each night, but Xander had no intention of going through that again, nor would Buffy want him to. What he'd done had been big, and while it was completely outside of what she thought would happen on a first date, she had enjoyed herself immensely.

The front door to the club opened and Denny came outside, taking a short break from hosting the show. "Don't worry hun," Denny assured her as she saw Buffy outside waiting, "Al will be out in a few minutes; he's just saying farewell to the others before he leaves."

"Yeah, I kinda figured that," Buffy replied, having realised he wouldn't just leave, "and he'd probably want to take a shower before leaving, f only to get all that oil off him," she added with a small grin.

"Yeah," she agreed with a chuckle, "he always hated putting that stuff on, saying that he felt like a turkey getting basted. It's a damn shame you know; Al has the ability to make it big in this business, especially now he's filled out a little."

"Going by his performance tonight I can see why," Buffy said a little warily, feeling that Denny might ask her to speak to Xander about returning on a more regular basis, "but you can only be the best at something if you love it, and Xander doesn't love this. He really enjoys what he's doing at the moment, and I can't see him wanting to do anything else."

"Oh I know, and I wish him well," Denny told her, having felt Buffy's unease, "but a girl can dream, can't she?"

Before Buffy could respond, Xander appeared from the side of the building, the bag that had his costume in his hand, which confused her a little as she thought he'd come out through the front.

Xander could see her look and decided to explain. "I used the fire exit; some of those women can get a little grabby with the guys if you try and leave through the front." he then noticed Denny standing there and flashed her a smile. "Thanks again for everything Denny," he told her sincerely.

"The pleasure was all mine, believe me," she replied, "the crowd loved you, and I almost had a riot on my hands when they found out you were only performing the once tonight. There's a lot of disappointed women in there right now," she teased him, knowing how flustered he had always gotten when the customers tried to get a private showing.

"Yeah, well," Xander said, a little flustered, "that was my last performance, Denny. It just isn't me." he wrapped his arm around Buffy and smiled as she leant into him, almost instinctively. "We better get a move on if we want to get back tonight," he told his girlfriend, a small grin appearing on his face as he thought that.

"I know," Buffy sighed, feeling a little sad that they're date would soon be over. She brightened up however when she realised that there would be plenty more dates to come, a lifetime of them if she had her way.

* * *

**Buffy and Willow's Dorm Room,  
UC Sunnydale,  
Sunnydale, California,  
Sunday 14th November 1999,  
22:35.**

"Well, here we are," Xander said as he dropped Buffy's bags at the foot of her bed, Willow fortunately nowhere to be seen.

Both knew that if she were around there'd be no chance of peace, as she'd be asking questions from the moment she saw them. Their weekend, and first date, was coming to an end, and neither one wanted it to. They both knew that there would be other dates, but that didn't stop them from wanting this one to go on forever.

"I had a fantastic weekend, Xander," Buffy told him sincerely, for what must be the dozenth time.

"Me too, although I have to say I hope we don't get held at gunpoint every time we go out, or have to deal with Cordelia."

"Nah, we've just got demons and apocalypses instead," she replied with a small smile, which only increased when she heard his groan.

"Joy."

Silence descended between them, as they both knew they couldn't stall any longer. There was one more thing to do before they parted ways, something they had both been looking forward to from the moment the date began; their first kiss.

Xander had thought of what their first kiss would be like on and off from the moment they first met, and their numerous close calls had only stoked the flames of his imagination. While she hadn't been thinking about it as long as Xander, Buffy was just as nervous about what was about to happen, more nervous than she could remember for that matter, but also filled with anticipation.

Suddenly, a feeling of calm flowed through Xander, and he made the first move and stepped closer to her, Buffy taking that as her cue and did the same. Soon they were so close to each other they were almost touching, and Xander looked down at Buffy for a few moments and allowed his eyes to show the depth of feeling he had for her, and was thrilled to see the same reflected in hers.

"Buffy, there's something I need to tell you," Xander whispered as he leaned down, their face inexorably close, "something I've wanted to tell you for a long time."

"What's that?" she asked softly, her eyes drawn from his eyes to his lips.

Xander took a deep breath and said the one thing he never thought he'd get to say to her. "I love you."

With that declaration, Xander closed the gap between them. Their lips moved against each other languidly, both of them savouring ever sensation, neither wanting to rush the moment. Xander's hand moved to gently cup Buffy's face, the pads of his thumbs gently stroking her silky skin.

Buffy's lips parted and Xander deepened the kiss, and his tongue silently requested entrance, a request that was immediately granted. Their tongues circled one another, dancing to a rhythm only they could hear, and their bodies began to follow, and they began to sway in time with the music.

After what felt like hours, although was probably no more than a few minutes, they parted, their eyes darked by the emotions invoked by the kiss, their chests rising and falling rapidly in an effort to replenish their air supply. After a moment, Xander touched his forehead to hers, their eyes still locked on each other, unwilling to break their connection.

"Wow," Xander breathed, almost overwhelmed.

"That was definitely worth the wait," Buffy said in agreement.

Eventually, they pulled apart, both smiling widely and completely unbothered by how silly they both looked.

"I don't want to, believe me I don't want to," Xander began, "but I have an early start at work tomorrow so I need to make a move."

"Yeah, and I have Walsh first thing, so I need all my wits about me," Buffy replied, although her tone indicated that the last thing she wanted was for him to go.

Xander leant down and kissed her again, forcing himself to step back back after only a couple of seconds, and went to the door. "Goodnight," he whispered, "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Goodnight," Buffy replied, and watched as he opened the door and left. Just as he was about to close the door behind him, she called out. "Xander!"

"Yeah Buff?" he said as he poked his head back in.

"I love you too," she told him with a smile.

The smile Buffy received was brighter the sun.

The End


End file.
